A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:back in feb i started to like this guy who i was working with. sad thing is i moved away after i started liking him him and i stayed in touch and we started heavy flirting thru text messages almost everyday. Iv grown to really like this guy over the last few months and i told him i liked him. I finally moved back and we still flirt and talk about getting togehter to hangout and stuff. I been kinda confused my feelings for him lately and i was getting the feeling something was upbecause we hardly talked like we use to. So after being kinda irriated i told him earlier that i was going to leave him alone for awhile in general and he kinda got defensive saying he was tired and stuff. I told him thats fine but i was still gonna leave him alone for awhile.. he finally tells me that hes happy just being friends and stuff and is gonna try not to heavy flirt so much...he said he doesnt want to lead me on and feel more like a jerk for it... i told him i was sorry... he said i didnt do anything wrong dont worry just bad timing... so i asked him what do you mean bad timing... he said i dont know really just what im feeling i wouldnt wanna go after you just to mess around... i asked him a series of questions due to why he wouldnt wanna hangout and if something were to happen how would he feel and why he wouldnt wanna just have fun... his answer to me was im nervous to hangout with you cuz im afraid of what i would want to do... then he finally breaks it to me that hes kinda liked another girl for awhile he feels bad cuz im a great girl but dont want to mess anyting up and that he was nervous to hangout and he didnt mention the othergirl cuZ he does like talking to me and considers me as a friend and thats what was holding him back he just doesnt want to be that guy who messes with me hurts me and then run off with someone else.. he said he feels bad cuz the heavy flirting we did turned him and he went along with it.. he feels guilty for talking with me like that and liking someone else... so i told him i was happy for him and if things dont work out then he knows where to find me... he said you'll be around anyway cuz were gonna chill dont worry and that we will figure it out... i asked him if anyting was going to happen with this other girl... he said no idea she likes me finally im not getting my hopes up just takingit slow..so my final text to him tonight was.. im gonna say one last thing cuz if i dont its going to eat me and i alwaysam the type to express my feeling... I feel like i made a complete *** out of myself and Im sorry i dragged you with me.. ill catch ya later have a goodnighthis last text to me was... you didnt not at all i like how you go after what you want and theres no last words were still gonna talk goodnightI dont know what to do... i have a feeling if we hangout something is gonna happen but at the same time i dont want to get in the middle of this drama and hes not understanding that i really dont want to stick around cuz of my feelings being involed... hes such a sweetheart no lie hes the type of guy you would want to take home to your family hes that much of a gentalman hes never disrespected me and im a pretty attractive girl i have guys always trying to getme but i cant stand jerks i thought i finally found someone who respected me for me and i was getting theses feeling of butterflies. I went down to his work yesterday and he gave me this amazing hug and when i left it felt like neither one of us wanted to let go... now he breaks this news to me and i dont know what to think or what to do... im pretty sure he likes me cuz he wouldnt be so nervous to hangout with me... should i play hard to get? i dont want to hurt his feelings if he still wants me in his life and i dont want to be mean and be like you missed out so im walking away im just so lost and sad i dont want to hurt him but im hurting :(
View related questions:
flirt, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (9 July 2011):
 Am sure he does like you to a certain point and yes he is making it clear that he is attracted to you on a sexual level, but it needs to be more than this. He likes this other girl he has told you that straight but I think you are wanting to pretend like he never told you that. He is pretty much keeping you around in case things don't go to plan with this girl. Its obvious that he likes this girl more than you and he wants to give it a shot. If she is not interested well then you are his plan B. He is keeping you sweet and warm for now but if this other girl is interested in him then he will get with her and you will be left hurt.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionoh & last night he told me out of the blue he was gonna be in town at one of the chain stores in our area & said if i wanna i can come say hi...
it sounds like this guy does like me & thinks of me alot without being real open about it... but i dont know what to think
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionoh & he already said people wouldnt see him with a girl like me & hes so shocked someone like me likes him... he def is a shy by the way..
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionso i break down & break my rule of talking to him cuz i was gonna see if he would chase me... he texted me to let me know about a job he ended up not getting & it was sweet he thought of me to let me know... so we ended up texting for a bit that night & me being such a girl i told him i was so confused & my head was spinning from him confessing his like for another girl for awhile & he told me "do you wanna know what it is I dont know whats going on with the other girl. I just wanted to make sure i gave it a chance i said i needed to change how i talk to you because i wanted to be all over you i realized that when i saw you the other night"
ok so its very clear hes sexually attracted to me... i dont know if he likes me likes me enough & i dont know if he likes me likes me like he likes the other girl...
what draws the line of emontional & sexual attraction... like i cant understand his thinking
& its picking at my mind whats the diff between his like for this other girl & his like for me... its like hes being such a guy in my case... & im not liking the feeling cuz i know if we ended up doing anything theres gonna be a bond between us cuz i actually "like" him but he keeps saying he doesnt wanna mess around & thats it & he feels bad
its probably clear as day & maybe i refuse to listen to it... im a great girl & he knows this he already told me... i just cant see why his sexual attraction to me covers everything else
& he already confessed when im around im all he can think about & after seeing me... but thats only because he saw me :( but good thing he already confessed of being curious & wants me bad
i dont know what to think how to feel or what to do...
...............................
A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (5 July 2011):
Ah what a horrible situation to be in. If I am honest with you, I will give this guy credit because he realised that he was wrong by flirting heavily with you when he knew he liked someone else and he admitted that he was wrong and was truthful to you. That takes a lot of guts for someone to do, so I will give him credit for that. It sounds to me like maybe he flirted with you to take his mind of this other girl, but also because he does like you, but it could be more as a friend instead of anything more.
The best thing you can do now is to take sometime to yourself and ask yourself can you deal with just being friends with this guy. He has made it clear that he likes some other girl that is not you, but he wants to be friends. But can you handle this? Because if you cant the best thing to do is to cut ties and tell him that you need some time on your own to get over your feelings.
...............................
|
