A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Last year I went to visit my best friend in other state. We have been friends for 8 years. Last year until now, he has been asking me to move to the state he is in to be with. He says he love me and we are trying to take our friendship to the next level. We really are the same person (same values, same mindset)we are best friends! Its not doubt that he loves me.However, the problem sets in when he gets a little too busy or goes through something and we don't talk. It irritates me! Sometimes he doesn't call for 3-4 days. I don't know if I should make this HUGE change and be with him??? Do people really get that busy (btw he is in the u.s service)??
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAlso I work in a hospital and can transfer my job to the state he is in. Since I am a college student here I live with my mom as I go for my nursing degree.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'm sorry. I am a college student. I also have my cna certification. I have visited with him a few times where he is at over this past year. I love it there. Its very beautiful there. Most of my friends are away at college. Unfortunately, I stayed home. I have only a sister and mother here.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2014): OP you don't give any practical reasons why you should. Just that you want to "try" to take it to the next level.
Pretty huge move for an experiment don't you think? I wouldn't give up everything I have where I am for an experiment. You didn't mention your career options, you don't talk about having any other friends there, you don't even talk about liking the place where he is. Nothing but that he wants you to move to him so you can have sex and see if it works.
I say no. Visit for a couple of weeks, take a little holiday and have a taste of what it might be like. Even then I'd wait a few months before making a decision, visit a couple more times, check out jobs, careers etc. You talk about him going absent emotionally at times, well you're going to feel very alone if you're only going there for him. Plus OP, you and he may work well as friends but there's no guarantee you can translate that into a good romance.
Take your time and test the waters. Visit a few times and see if it takes your fancy. you can also test the intimacy aspect and get a minor taste of what living with him would be like.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (2 April 2014):
 I can't imagine anything "good" coming from it if you move to be where he is.... What is your status where you are now (job, housing, family....)?
Good luck....
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