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Should I message my work crush?

Tagged as: Crushes, Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (11 August 2015) 2 Answers - (Newest, 12 August 2015)
A male United Kingdom age 26-29, *_Fozzle writes:

Hi there... So a few weeks ago a new guy started at work and he gets the same bus to and from work as me. He is totally gorgeous and I fancied him as soon as I saw him. Now after a few weeks of awkward eye contact and the occasional smile if we pass at work I've found him on a gay dating app. Obviously I'm over the moon, but should I message him? He's way out of my league and I don't want the embarrassment of having to see him everyday if he rejects me... I'm so confused, help???

View related questions: at work, crush

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (12 August 2015):

Honeypie agony auntI agree, the saying don't shit where you eat always rings to mind. (it's a little crude, but it makes sense)

Just like don't DATE where you work. Your place of work is where you are expected to be professional, dating co-workers can bring drama and many other "less" professional events into the work place - which isn't smart nor... professional.

Let's say he isn't out as a gay man at work. (because he wants to be seen/known for WHAT he does work-wise and not his sexual preference) - do you think he would then WANT to date a male co-worker?

I think when it comes co-workers it's usually MUCH smarter and safer to keep romance off limit.

I'd skip this one, gorgeous or not.

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A male reader, PiEuro United Kingdom +, writes (11 August 2015):

If there's one piece of advice I've been given time and time again by previous seniors/colleagues, it's to not get involved romantically with anyone in your place of work. For example, if your relationship with them (for whatever reason) turns sour, at least one of you will feel negative towards the other. If this person ranks either beneath you or above you in workplace, they may make your life excessively difficult out of spite.

I appreciate that he may be gorgeous or have a wonderful personality, but if it's a job you want to stay in for a while, I would suggest leaving it. If you wanted to make an investment for the future, you could always befriend him and try and take it to the next level once one of you had left that place of work.

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