A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I worked for some friends abroad for a year. and while I was there i got involved with my mothers friends husband (Im 18, he's 34) The affair was short and I expected to go home at the end of my work and forget all about it. Problem is I just cant!! I cant stop thinking about him and its really getting to me. He told me that him and his wife were no longer in love and they were only staying together for the sake of the home and business. I just dont know if I should believe him. I know what i did was wrong, and it could jepordise evetrything. I just need some advice to get over him or if i should tell him how i feel?!He said he was coming back home (we are from the same area, he moved away and i stayed) in December and i dont know if i should meet him!please help!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2010): No, you need to leave this man alone. He's a jerk, a cheater and a creep. And, if he's cheating on his wife with you, what makes you think he won't cheat on you if he leaves her for you? Once a cheater always a cheater.
I think you need to find someone your age who is actually single. If you DO go after this guy, you're only going to get your heart broken. Not worth it, I know from experience.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2010): Hi,Here is what I think: you need answers to how you are feeling about him. Living in limbo is no way to live, just sitting and guessing as to what is happening or what will happen. I think meeting with him is not a bad idea, but you would have to get some straight answers as to what is going on with him and his wife before you would continue to see him. If he is seperated from her and they are heading to divorce, then maybe there could be a shot at this you want to take.If he gives you answers, then trust, but verify. You have to find out if he is telling you the truth before you continue on. If you don't like the answers he is giving you, then you would have to to do a very tough thing: leave him. God knows it is not easy at all.Not every situation like this is all bad as some would want you to believe. You just have to be careful with your heart and be sure his actions will verufy his words to you.Best of luck in what you decide to do!!
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (28 September 2010):
No you shouldn't believe him! Look at what has happened here. You went abroad and wound up having sex with a married man who claimed he wasn't in love with his wife anymore and just stayed together for the sake of it! Rubbish. What happened was a 34 year old man saw a somewhat naive teenager and used her. He's a married man and he's had a great time at your expense here.
Why women consistently fall for the crap married men spew is beyond me. But you've joined the millions of other women who have fallen for it. Don't make the mistake of continuing to do so. He's a liar and a cheat and doesn't care about you at all.
Do you want to be some married guy's mistress? Or would you rather be something important a decent guy?
To get over him, look at him for what he is. A total liar who was willing to use you and make a mockery of you.
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