A
female
age
41-50,
*lueyes2008
writes:I am dating a man 16 years older then I am. He was in the middle east for a while and met someone while he was there. She send him texts and even calls him. When I am not around he will take the calls and even text her back. Today I found a text he sent her in December saying how much he missed her and for her to look into the sky and know that he was there with her. So my question is should I let him go? I love him so much but I just don't know what to do.
View related questions:
text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Devilish Angel +, writes (24 January 2008):
 I think that like any relationship with any man, when one partner loses interest, it is cruel for that one person to not let the other go. I mean that he should tell you how he feels about you and you need to tell him how much he is hurting you. This is not so much about age different rather than what a prick he is for wanting another woman when he has you right by his side.
Give him a good talking to and find another man who's not looking at the skies, longing for another woman.
A
female
reader, duskyrowe  +, writes (21 January 2008):
 Bravo I am glad you have seen the light.
...............................
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (21 January 2008):
 Maybe, you could ask him when he is free.He could be unaware of your urgency.You have to give him time and don't be hasty in conclusion and you could be wrong.Give him another chance to be sure.
...............................
A
female
reader, blueyes2008 +, writes (21 January 2008):
blueyes2008 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionToday I got the answer I needed from him. I asked if maybe we should have a date night. His answer was no we have to work. I guess this means its over. I am planning on telling him tomorrow after work. I can not live like this. I feel as if I am here just for someone to talk to to. I want to thank you all for all of your help and advice. I will give you an update tomorrow.
...............................
A
female
reader, Sweet-thing +, writes (21 January 2008):
 Without disclosing the fact that you snooped you need to sit him down and ask him how he feels about you and where does he see your future going. If he acts like everything is punchy-king, you should ask him if he still has feelings for the woman he became involved with while he was away from you. Hopefully you'll be able to figure out what you need to do (let go, or hang on) after this discussion. Listen to what he says, how he says it, and what his body language is telling you. Good luck.
...............................
A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (20 January 2008):
Is he still loving to you?
Some men like to flirt but the trouble is they don't take the trouble to delete those flirtatious texts and can cause problems with their g/f's.
You said you love him very much. How can you love him so much and want to let him go just like that because you found a flirty message.
In any relationship, you need to work at it. You simply cannot give him up for something like that. If it affects you so much , you should thrash out the problem with him.
Communicate your problems with him and resolve this matter in an amicable manner.
...............................
A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (20 January 2008):
Drop this middle aged Lothario like a Hot Potato. Find a guy who only has eyes for you, you need this creep and the pain that he causes you like a hole in the head.
She is welcome to him, she will find out in time what a two timing rat he really is. Never ever be second best to any guy.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 January 2008): I suppose a lot depends on the type of relationship he had with this other girl on the other side of the world.
If it was a sexual one, and he's not ever going back there, and she's not coming to the US, the chances are that the two of them are remembering what a good time they had together and nothing is ever likely to come of it in the future.
If it was platonic, there's nothing to worry about at all. It's not unusual to have friends of the opposite sex. I've got several and there's never ever going to be anything sexual about those friendships.
However, I think you should ask him where you stand in all this. He may be the honest type and give it to you chapter and verse, or he may lie through his back teeth if he's not. Perhaps he's keeping all his options open, but if you're at all uncomfortable with him being in contact with the other woman perhaps you should call it a day.
Phil
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 January 2008): I think you already know the answer and you just want confirmation from us aunts. Yes, let him go, he will never be faithful if he is like this now. You are young and can move ahead. Dont wait until your heart is completely broken and ripped from within you. Please end this now and meet someone who will be 100% yours, which he clearly isnt and make a life for yourself with them. End it now. Tomorrow will be the start of your new life, a one without text, lies and deceit.
take care
xx
...............................
|
