A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i have been going out with a guy for past 9 months and has fallen deeply in love with him. last month he went to thailand on a holiday and it was his second visit to thailand. he wanst going out with me when he visited thailand for the first time and when he started to go out he told me at the begining that he slept with two thai women on a holiday because at that time he was single. i asked him if he would do same again and he said he wont do it because know he has gf and loves her so much. i trusted him to sent him on a holiday. he kept on sending me messages abt how much he loves me and that i can trust my man on a holiday because he will be faithful as always and we can get on with our life happily together after he comes back. he went to thailand and texted me saying how much he loves me everyday and he shouldnt have gone on a holiday. he came back and next day was my birthday. on the day of my birthday he told me that he got so drunk that he couldnt remember anything and next thing he knows in the morning is there is a slut sleeping next to him. slut asked for a money. he said she raped him and robbed him. he said he went to doctors this morning and founf out that he has std and in next two weeks he will do a test to see if he has hiv/aids. he says he still loves me. at that time i was very angry and told him that he broke my heart and cannot love anyone in his life. all the 14 gfs he had till now didnt had problem but its him who has problem thats the reason he couldnt have long lasting relationship with any of them. the fact which made me more angry is that he promised me that he will not get drunk and wont hit clubs. he admitts that he broke his promise and says that he made the biggest mistake of his life by going to thailand again. after 2 hours i was calm and called him again and told me that even though he loves me, he thinks iam better off with other man. i said to him if he loves me as he says he has to change his drinking habit fot better and try to be a better man and iam ready to forgive him once and also told him that i wont leave him in situation where he needs emotional and mental support and it would be very selfish of me if i did. i tried to convince him to change his habits for better but he said to me that no one can change and the way he told me that we will spend life together was a mistake and he wants to sleep with thousands of women and is very scared by the fact that iam going to be the only women he will ever have to sleep with. he is 26 now and iam 21. he says he is too young to have serious relationship with me even though he loves me. i dnt know wot to do bcz i do still love him but i dnt know whether this person is trying to make himself look bad simply bcz he doesnt want to hurt me or maybe it is his intention to sleep with thousands of women. so should i try to take this guy back or just leave him and move on with my life even though it will be very hard?
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drunk, money, move on, std, text Reply to this Question
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female
reader, chickpea2011 +, writes (25 September 2011):
 Hi,I know how you feel, I just ended a 10 years relationship a year ago because of cheating. I couldn't forgive him.. But, my situation was different. I believe people can change, and its ok to forgive, and stay together, there's no shame at all. I truly believe that he got drunk, didn't have any intensions of cheating on you. When you go to these foreign countries, these people know when you are not a local person, as I reading your post, I just got this gut feeling that your boyfriend was being honest, and I do believe that someone in the bar put some drugs in his drink, I am positive, because these people from the bar works together with these prostitutes, it's their way of living, robbing people. so, I don't consider this intensional cheating. He was really raped, and robbed. I feel sorry for your boyfriend. What concerns though, it's the fact that your boyfriend told you that he wants to have sex with thousands of people? I don't understand what he meant by saying that? Is he being honest or is he trying to save you from the pain? If he's truly sorry, promise you that he will be faithful, then I am sure that you can work things out, but if he's not ready for a committed relationship, then I think its best if you end with him. First, you need to get your answers straight. Try to figure out what he wants to do in the future. Second, try to get the results for the STD test, very important. After you have a serious conversation with him, get the STD results, you can decide what you want to do? Stay together, or move on?Hope you make the right decision, and hope you feel betterGood luck
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2011): Move on...
"he says he is too young to have serious relationship with me even though he loves me"
He doesn't know what love is yet. Save yourself a world of hurt. Find someone who will love you.
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A
female
reader, NatalieNicole +, writes (24 September 2011):
I say ride it out a little longer. Make sure he is being honest and faithful and treats u a way u deserve!! Good luck!!
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