A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I need some work related advice!!Back in March, I was working for a car dealership that I loved! But my GM, We'll call him X, ended up quitting and went to work at another dealership.. It's important to mention that the night he quit, we had sex. It was a long time coming and I know it wasn't the moral thing to do but it happened..Well I left the dealership in April because with new management the politics changed, and I wasn't happy. After me and X had sex, we didn't talk again for a long while. A few people from my job left to go be with X at his new dealership, where he is now the finance director. I really wanted to go also, but I hadn't spoken to him since we slept together and I thought he'd look at it as "clingy" or weird if I tried to work there also, so I ended up working at another dealership..One day I called one of my old co-workers (We'll call him Y) who now works in finance as well with X at their new dealership.. He told me to come visit soon to catch up, so the following week I did.. Of course, I saw X again and turns out he lost my phone number, which is why I hadn't heard from him. We started texting again that same day and we've had sex a few times since then..Well here's the problem.. Things at my dealership have been okay, but there was an incident that happened with a co-worker and it has broken my entire spirit. I had to report it to the police and my managers, but as of now he still works here and it makes me not wanna be here at all, I can almost say I hate it here now. I went to visit Y recently, and he keeps begging me to go work with him and says he can get me hired in a matter of days.I want to say yes and just leave my job entirely and never look back, but again, I'm afraid of going to X and saying "Can you give me a job".. I don't want it to compromise anything or come off as a clingy turn off. It's where I rather be.. But I don't want to put a bad taste in his mouth. We've semi talked about me working there before, but more in a laughing way. Deep down, I want him to say "Come work with us" and then I'd feel okay about it.. So I'm wondering, should I just swallow the frog and go to X for a job, wait until he offers, or stay where I'm at?
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2017): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI can't really see me going to another dealership.. If I were to leave, I'd have to be out this business altogether just cause it's so much to handle. I'd only feel comfortable working at this other place so I feel my best bet is to kind of wait things out and maybe ease into the conversation with him.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2017): Find a job at another dealership altogether. Don't sleep with your co-workers. Seems wherever you go, trouble follows.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (9 August 2017):
 I'd consider that charge as a warning sign and stay away.
If you aren't happy with your current job look for a job elsewhere, NOT where he is at.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2017): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSexual assault is the nice way to put it
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (9 August 2017):
What kind of charges?
Yikes!
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A
male
reader, Riot2017  +, writes (9 August 2017):
"I'm still torn, I'm thinking I should just wait it out at work and see what happens with this guy."
Good decision, just take care from that guy that it's a risk on your current work.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2017): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionCharges have been pressed against him, but they can't fire him yet so I'm not sure what's going to happen.. But the last time we had sex was a week ago, but it's never awkward when we're around each other. I saw him earlier today at his dealership, and we were just talking about work, it was casual. I'm still torn, I'm thinking I should just wait it out at work and see what happens with this guy.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (8 August 2017):
Are you still sleeping with him?
If so ASK him if he still wants you to apply for a job there.
However, it might NOT be in your best interest (like people have told you in ALL your other posts with this same question) to work with a boss who is also your love interest or WAS a "bang in the night".
It makes you seem unprofessional.
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A
male
reader, Riot2017 +, writes (7 August 2017):
The only person that haves enough information for taking the best decision is you.
If you trust mr X and mr Y, and you think things are going to be well working with them, then go ahead and move.
If you think that things with mr X are going to be bad or awkward, then stay where you are.
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2017): You just gave a reason why you don't use your job as your dating pool. Messing around with co-workers creates these types of issues that wouldn't exist if you stayed on professional terms.
You slept with your boss; so now you worry about being clingy?
If it will get you out of a sticky-situation and guarantees you employment. Which is the lesser of evils?
You should look for another dealership altogether. You're making a mess everywhere you go. You didn't want to explain what happened with the co-worker; but the fact he can still work there means you had some measure of responsibility in what happened. Apparently it didn't require his termination. Or, no charges were filed.
You need to start over from scratch and keep a professional-distance away form your male co-workers.
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