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Should I leave my current gf and get back with my ex-gf?

Tagged as: The ex-factor<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (31 August 2006) 3 Answers - (Newest, 1 September 2006)
A male , anonymous writes:

Should I leave my current girlfriend and get back with my exgirlfriend?

I've been with my current girlfriend for about 1 year now. In the begining, I thought I loved her. I am not sure if I do.

I tried to tell my current girlfriend that I am not over my ex fully, but she won't accept what I am telling her. I've leveled with her, but she refuses to consider breaking up. It makes me nervous thinking about breaking up with her. I think she might lose it. I don't want to hurt her feelings and I don't want her seeking revenge either.

My exgirlfriend and I were in a relationship for 5 years. I do miss my exgirlfriend, but we had some problems before though. My ex was generally nice, but she seemed cold at times. However, we didn't argue much and I didn't feel threatened by her.

I have DIFFERENT problems with my current girlfriend. My current girlfriend requires a lot more time and is much more clingy. She gets angry and nasty easily, but she is good in bed.

My exgirlfriend says we can overcome our differences and she wants me back, but I am not sure if I should dump my current girlfriend for my exgirlfriend. I might be making a big mistake. I've considered the pros and cons and still can't decide.

I want to do the right thing, but I don't know what to do or how to go about doing it.

View related questions: miss my ex, my ex, revenge

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A male reader, Lostandalone United States +, writes (1 September 2006):

Lostandalone agony auntIt seems to me that you broke up with your ex and found your current. You are still in love with your ex but the current was really good in bed so you stayed mistaking orgasm for love. Now that you have known this person outside of the bedroom she is not what you are looking for in a life time deal. My advice, follow your heart. You shouldn't be in a relationship just because it makes the other person happy or because they might seek revenge. Go after your happiness full throttle. Don't let precious time pass think what if and how come and why. Go and live the life that you want not one that suits someone else. Good Luck.

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A female reader, angel frm above +, writes (31 August 2006):

angel frm above agony auntIf you are not happy in the current realtionship you are in then you shouldnt have to carry on with it just remember tho you cant dump someone and go out with another person to soon because the person will already be very upset because of losing you and then for her to find out you are with another person quite fast could make her even more depressed.

You should sit down with your current girlfriend and just gently say to her it isnt working out I dont think we should carry on seeing each other but make sure she isnt going to do anything stupid.

BUT before you do all this you need to have a good hard long think about what you want to do look deep into your current girlfriends eyes and think about what you see how you feel hold her close and see how you feel if you still dont want to be with her anymore then you need to tell her you cant lead her on it isnt fair. Remember to consider everything before you take action think long and hard about it. Best wishes angel frm above

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A female reader, j'sgurl +, writes (31 August 2006):

Maybe you should take step back from both girls for a while and decide what it is you really want from a relationship while you arent actually in one. It seems like there are pros and cons for both relationships but at the end of the day you should be doing what makes you happy. Either with one of them or none of them. Dont stay with your current girl just because you dont want to hurt her as the longer you stay the more it will hurt if you leave later down the track. Ask yourself if you are remembering your past relationship with rose coloured glasses and glossing over the past dramas you had with her.

Try telling them both that you want to take some time out to clear your head and decide what you really want. Put a time limit on it say a month or whatever you are comfortable with so you dont leave them hanging. Try to have minimal contact with them. If they are truely supportive of you they will wait. Sometimes the distance can help you see things clearer.

Good luck

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