A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Hello dearcupid. Yesterday I spoke about dirty text messages on my girlfriend's phone, most people told me either to give her an ultimatum, or just dump her. The only thing is through what I've seen would I be a mug to see if I can get past this, and wait?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2009): Omg i know EXACTLY how u feel, this has just happened to me and when I told my friends they didn't even question it they told me they were sorry it was over and that he had hurt me s much by cheating on me and ending it in this way...and I hadn't even told them that we had broken up yet!! That pretty much confirmed what I had been thinking that it was well and truly over! He didn't even try and question it, he knew it was over too and didnt try to save the relationship, that probably hurt the most, but it told me a lot. The trust is completely gone, you'll ALWAYS question who else she is texting or worse and do u want to be in a relationship like this??
I love him an miss him like crazy and everyday i think about telling him I'll give him another chance (even though he hasnt asked for one!!) but I know in my head I have to get through it and stop myself as it would make me (i.e. you) such a mug and also seem a bit desperate. She would know from then on that she had all the power and could basically get away with anything and next time it could go beyond texting...who's to say it wouldnt have if you hadn't found those messages.
The way i see it it's still cheating, if not worse because it can't be explained as a spur of the moment or drunken thing which is bad enough...but it has such intent and it means she was thinking about someone else even when she was with you.
If someone truly loves you and wants to be with only you they would never do it. It's so so hard and I understand but make yourself move on to someone who would give you the love and commitment that you give them, let yourself have better than what she is offering x
A
female
reader, totsxx +, writes (8 January 2009):
you ask her what the deal is with the text and if she does not give you a good enough reason you tell her CYA....
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A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit +, writes (8 January 2009):
Yes you would be a mug to see if you can get past this and wait.
Where is your self respect?
-Frank Kermit
www.franktalks.com
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