A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So I started talking to this girl like a month ago. We only started hanging out because there was a party and she wanted to go, ever since then she barely texts me or wants to hang out, we both just text each other when we know there's a party. This one night we both went to a party together and we hooked up. Before we did, we were both drunk and she stated that she knew my intentions and she didn't mind if we made out but that I shouldn't like her because she's just trying to have fun. I agree and I really don't care because I'm on the same boat. So things go well that nightWe decide to go a club together and the whole time she didn't drink, I was the only one drinking. And we probably danced a little, barely but the whole night I didn't put moves on her because I was getting mixed signals plus I can barely hear at a club. In the end of the night I kissed her on the cheek but it seemed like she wanted more because when she left my car she gave me this odd stare, which I didn't know what it meant.My question is that I have no idea what this girl wants from me. Was I on a date or did we go their as friends. She called me bro at one point of the night which made me more confused. I texted her the day after twice but she doesn't reply. Did I mess up? Should I have attempted to do a move on her that night? I just don't get her deal, how do I approach this situation.
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drunk, move on, moved in, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, wiseoldman  +, writes (22 February 2014):
No matter how subtly she extends the invitation, if a man does not take up a woman's first offer through either non-observance, inexperience or lack of courage, she will never give him another chance.
A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (21 February 2014):
"She's just not that into you."
You may offer a fun distraction but that's it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell I'm just beating myself up at the moment because after read all of your helpful advice, I do believe all she wanted was to hook up that night and I didn't give it to her that night which probably made her confused as why last time we did hook up and this time nothing happened.
She hasn't responded to any of my texts since yesterday and I also texted her again today about a party going on and no reply. I'm stopping from texting her now but I feel like I missed my chance at anything.
I hope she talks to me again and we can pick from where we left off, hoping that next time I will do a move rather than act oblivious.
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A
female
reader, XxImThatGirlxX +, writes (21 February 2014):
Sounds like she's playing games. Not really a bad thing but she probably wanted sex that's night so that's why she gave you a weird stare. It's better off u didn't tho because it's kind of a tease. If you both just wanna have fun then keep it casual. If I was you I wouldn't text her again. Wait until she texts you back and she probably will. If she doesn't then just move on with your life. But I bet you guys will hook up again.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2014): Ask her outright, say what do you want from me?The bro thing isn't so much an issue, I call people bro all the time, it's just one of those words that flies about and everyone says them and then it all suddenly stops. Your only true way to know how she feels is to ask her. Can you give me some examples of the mixed signals? I might be able to help a little more but the best thing is really to ask her.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2014): you need to ask her what she thought you two were up to. a date or just going as friends. you need to find out so you can take it from there.
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