A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My ex boyfriend of 2 years cheated on my with his ex of 8 years to whom he had a child and a mortgage with. It wasn't just a one off wither, every time he told me he was going to see his daughter, he was in fact sleeping with her. He even went on holiday with her and told me he was with his cousins.The day I found out, I split up with him, and that very night, he moved back in with her. After we had been split up for 4 months, he got back in touch and we became friendly again, sometimes spending the night with eachother.11 months on, and we are meeting up again. He is still living with her, but says its only because he can see child all the time. He wants us to get back together, but I cannot trust him - yet I love him, and truley think he's my solemate. My family would go mad if we got back together, and I even think I'm mad contemplating the idea. HELP!
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female
reader, Astrid  +, writes (4 July 2008):
 I think he is not a nice person, he has lied to you before and nothing seems to show he has changed his behaviour, it was easy for her to get him to sleep together for a night and as you dropped him he moved back to her, you cannot always be there for him when things go wrong with that "lady" as she is not a standard of behaviour or stability it is not your problem anymore do not allow them to desestabilize you emotitionally just move on go out with other people, family, gym etc go shopping and you'll get better soon love, e mail me any time you need help
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2008): Okay you are right; you are not "mad" but you are emotionally unstable; you cannot consider getting back togehter with this guy; in fact you are doing yourself harm by meeting with him; you need to break all contact with this guy; he will EMOTIONALLY destroy you; cut all ties;
Yes, I know it is difficult; BUT it will only get worse in the future; you will never trust him; imagine a life with this guy; the child will alwyas be there; he will always see his child; pick her up, drop her off; you will go INSANE with worry and FEAR; imagine you do get toghether, things are great for a while, you police him and are happy; he is not cheating; then you decide to have a baby; then he starts messing around again; Oh my dear, just FORGET about this guy:
Do you honestly believe you cannot do better then him?
I don't; I do blieve you can; go, go and look at yourself in the mirror, please; go talk to yourself; start loving yourself; tell yourself that you can do better and that you DESERVE better;
CUT ALL TIES; that is the most important thing you must do;
then go and find a person that will love you and respect you; not lie to you and cheat behind your back;
Come on; BE STRONG.
Think about your FUTURE.
Lots of good wishes and SMILES.
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A
female
reader, howcomehoney  +, writes (4 July 2008):
 Don't go back. Do NOT go back. It will happen again. Look at what's happening now: it's the same situation as before, but in reverse. He doesn't know what he wants. You know very well that you shouldn't go back.
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