A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Aiight, check it... I'm 20, two years ago ago I was with this girl, she's 18.. knowing how she was.. she was scared of letting her parents find out, so we were in a private love affair...Things got really heated and we almost had sex on many occasions, but she was a virgin and I'm a christian, so we couldn't continue...as time went by, I wanted more, she seemed to just want to keep it simple.... we spent less time together and I started to work and go school at the same time, so we hardly saw each other...4 months she sent me a text that "she wants us to be just friends, nothing more"Shocked and close to finals... I desperately wanted to get some answers...Turned out she had a new man... turns out she "loves" him... she says or claims... when we are around each other.... even though we don't kiss any more, it's like she is single...What through me in a loop is when I was at her house with some friends and her man was outside.. she went inside, I followed her and we kissed (twice)...(for about 2-3 minutes each time)... she went into the bathroom and cried... I was forcing her to choose between who she wanted to be with.... She says she can't choose..Her man is on vacation and the weekend after he left.. she agreed to go out with me.. we had fun... i set the stage.. the scenery and everything.. see I'm in Jamaica and we were on the beach... I gave a necklace i bought for her... we were there just joking around.. but then i tried to kiss her and she turned away...Check it... she told my lil' bro the next day, she did that to piss me off and she constantly tries to piss me off... it works sometimes her other times i see right through her tactics... and call her out on it...I love this freaking girl, i think she still loves me, i want her and i can't stop thinking about her... she sent me a text that we aren't in a "romantic relationship" and that's because she doesnt want to, and i should ask why....There is so much more... but for now.. what are ya'lls views because I'm leaving to the US next summer and 4 years to finish school and she said that she is scared of how our relationship will be like...Please help me out... just say what you think...
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female
reader, holly123  +, writes (27 July 2009):
your right there though, the heart wants what the heart wants :)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThx.. well to give an update... I kinda backed off a bit..she told that I was doing some stuff to piss her off and the more i do them, the less she feels for me... i mean when we are 2gr, it feels at times like nothing else in the world really matters.. I've been in quite a few serious relationships, but none never quite felt like this.. my ex who i was with for about 2 years roughly, seriously wants me back, but i can only think of my dream girl... i mean i only want her, no one else...
I know school os important and i will be getting my masters degree and all soon.. but +++ya'll tell me... wat does all the money in the world do if you ain't happy.. and right now... I find happiness being with her
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2009): You are 20, how can you tell she's the love of your life. How much do you know about her character, goals, aspirations and desires in life to consider her that?It probably sucks to hear that, but you are in love or infatuated with her, and strongly, but from there to her being the love of your life, there's a great distance.Ask yourself this: Do you want to spend the rest of your life with a girl that cheats on her boyfriend, who can't decide whether she wants you only, and uses manipulation tactics on you????Don't be mad at her, I don't mean to trash talk about her either. Let's face the facts, she's 18, she's just started discovering about life and men on her own, most probably she does have very strong feelings for both of you and is feeling right now as confused and achy as you are. Plus if her parents are/were over protective with hear it'll be harder for her to control herself.I really admire your decision of being a virgin until marriage, it takes a lot of determination, self-control and having your priorities in life well stablished.I believe that your going away to the US is actually a good opportunity to develop your self and discover whether she really is the love of your life. If she is, you'll return four years later (with an abroad degree) and find a much more mature woman who has discovered more about herself and isn't feeling as reckless as she probably is right know.That will be the best time for both of you to rediscover each other and find out if you want to be toghether for life without anything in the middle.The other possibility is both of you grow your own way and have a nice memory of what happened between you, and maybe are already inlove with someone else.Let things be, I know how you're felling right know. I'vee been in love and everytime I've felt like you are feeling right know. There have been relationships where I've gone too far trying to make things work because I believe it is the love of my life, but when thing aren't ment to be they just aren't.Take her word up on being friends, only that. Is the best way to go right now. If you find it too difficult to be with her without desiring her or feeling jealous, break up personal contact (you're too busy) and only keep in touch by mail.DON'T GET INTO A LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP, for it will only mean that she''l continue seeing the other guy and you'll be suffering in the US without being able to focus on your studies and the new opportunity you have. Don't worry, if things are ment to between you, they will happen in due, trust in God that things work that way.Wish you lots of happiness and blessings.
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A
female
reader, holly123 +, writes (22 July 2009):
i think this girl is messing with your head. you need a serious chat with her. dont let any of you leave until you have sorted it x
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