A
female
age
30-35,
*unbun
writes:So i dated this guy for 2 years and became completely attached and in love with him. He breaks up with me alittle after 2 years and i am absolutely devasted. I try to move on but am never successful at it and it hurt even more because we stopped talking. About a year later we reconnected and became friends but realized how much we really cared for eachother and enjoy being with eachother so we got back together. We dated for a year and last thursday he broke up with me again. He is being more mature about it and talking to me and smiling at me but its not the same. He is still cutting me out of his life and nothing seems to bother him. The night he broke up with me he held me while i cryed and he even had tears in his eyes. He said that he just didnt want to be in a relationship anymore and was done dealing with everything that came along with it. All i can think about is getting him back but people tell me he doesnt deserve a third chance.. I cant always be waiting around for him or there would be no reason for him to make a serious committment to me. I dont know how to move on. He was the most important person in my life and i was closer to him than anyone else and now im just suppose to cut him out completely. I have to keep myself from calling, texting, or emailling him because its not right that i am always the only one trying to talk. I just miss him so much. I cant eat and i can barely sleep. I have to be preoccupied or i fall apart. Im so lost with out... i really did love him with my whole heart and i dont know how to move past him. there are no other guys in my school worth any of my time. My stomach is killing me and i just want to fall asleep and never wake up.. everytime i see him tears swarm in my stomach and when i walk away i have to fight the tears away. I just want to be in his arms again but there is nothing i can do. He has moved on=(.. all i can think about is waiting till he misses me again but i know i shouldnt give him another chance... what do i do=(?~heartbroken
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2007): Because you say you are still in school it sounds to me like you are both young and he needs to explore other things and nature a bit without being seriously commited to someone at this stage. If you were older i would question whether he is a commitmentphobe. I would not worry about what everyone says only you know whats best my best advice is to let him go as you have done in the past. If he comes back again down the line you may still care for him and want to try again or you may feel you have moved on. WhetheR you have a future with him or not though either way you need to let go of the old relationships completely at this point. Its necessary for you to heal as much as for him to have space to figure out just what he can give you. Break ups are never easy i know i am going through an awful one but your present situation is just a reflection of your past not of your future so you never know you may end up together one day or you may find the man of your dreams tomorrow good luck!
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