A
female
age
41-50,
*erato
writes:"I have been with a guy for 7 years who is not ready to get married yet, we are both approaching 30 and to make things worse we have been living in different cities for 3years now. Our relationship has survived the distance until recently when we started having fights. I told him I would be willing to move to his city if we were married regardless of the fact that our careers are both doing very well in each city.He continues to pursue better job prospects in his city and chooses them over jobs that are availble in my city. I've tried to break things up with him recently and he told me he needs about a month to think things through. I know he loves me but he did not give me reason to believe that he wants to fight for this relationship.I'm starting to think that maybe it has to do with my nagging over and over about the issue. Should i just forget about this guy? I've lost patience and I end up sending him hurtful and harsh e-mails. He says lately I don't believe anything he says. I'm hurting deeply and not sure what to do.A part of me wants to give this relationship another chance. Should I give him the month's period to think things through?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 April 2008): Hey,
I think you should give him this extra month, like the first poster said, you've already waited 7 years, so 1 more month isn't much. I also agree with another poster though, who said that 7 years is a LONG time - he should know what he wants by now...
BUT, if at the end of 'the month' he says he's still not sure, I'm sorry but I don't think he's the one for you - guys who can't make decisions about important things are hurt and trouble.
Good luck!
A
female
reader, Enzian  +, writes (7 April 2008):
 Hi there
7 years are a long time, one month ore more is nothing at that ratio. So give him that other month, but don't give him an other an another and only one more and an other one... He had 7 years to think about it, that should be enough.
Think hard about what you want. If he realy is your Mr. Right give him that chance. You waited that long, I'm sure you are able to wait an other month.
But tell him what you feel and that you want to have a serious relationship, not just beeing the nice thing next to him, he can use for what he wants. If he realy loves you, he should know what he wants to do. He had enough time to think about it and get ready to get married...
You have a right to know, where you stand!
Hope, I could help a little...
Take care!
xxx
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A
female
reader, MissWendlemoot  +, writes (7 April 2008):
 No, he has had 7 years worth of chances. What he is doing is stalling so you'll take him back and continue on as they are without him having to anything. You have waited long enough.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (7 April 2008):
 Yeah! Right! Give him that one month to really think it over.
Then you can move on and not be frozen in time.
You are prepared to move to his city , why can't he accept that?
Life is not about careers but the blossoming of relationships .
Get his priorities right!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 April 2008): another month after 7 years......!!!!
Sounds like the man has no balls...
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