A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I have been together two years now and then just last week, the day of my boyfriend's 18th birthday, his dad "grounds" ME from his house. I haven't been to my boyfriend's house in exactly a week now and it's because I couldn't get a car quick enough and so I left at midnight with my dad's car (with my dad's permission) and I went to my boyfriend's house because my boyfriend told me he would be outside waiting for me (he wasn't) and his dad says in an aggressive tone, "I ask you to leave my house and you're here! What's the problem?" His mom smiled, but said, "Hon, calm down." I know his parents have everything in the world against me because they are crazy people (especially his mom), but I want to know how I can get out of this! I have done absolutely everything in my power to make them approve of me, I even keep my opinions to myself when it comes to how they feel about lower-income people: I come from a low-income family and they're basically always bashing them (not really my family, but those who file bankruptcy when they absolutely have to). Since my boyfriend grew up in that environment, he feels the same way about certain issues. Plus he's becoming too friendly with another girl for comfort. He's even taking her to see the Chicago skyline in a 172 before me! WHAT THE HELL!?Should I get out of this now or wait it out? And how do I get his parents to remove the sticks from their asses?
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male
reader, rcn +, writes (5 December 2008):
 First of all, growing up without much is not bad. Material goods do not determine who we are as individuals. I would recommend getting out now. Not because of his parents, but his behavior with the other girl. He's weak spirited, not standing up to his parents. I think this will continue if you stay with him. You can't force acceptance by the parents. It sounds as if they won't change, so the relationship will continue to be affected by their negative behavior.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2008): Hey thereMy parents used to be a little crazy as well, but I really liked the girl I was with, and stood up for her, even when faced with the prospect of being 'kicked out'. It sounds like your boyfriend has not even said a word to his family about you being 'grounded' from his house. Judging from this, and the snobbery mentioned, it sounds like he is still very immature and self obbsessed. The whole business with the Cessna just sounds like a small child wanting to show off to a new playmate.Of course, I cannot judge him, but simply looking at the way you type about him answers your own questions. Before you do end it, try to put your thoughts forward to him. He may not accept them, but at least you know you did every thing you could, and he might think more carefully in the future.Good luckMax
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