A
female
age
36-40,
*ach23
writes:My boyfriend and I have been living together for a year now and at first he was the most wonderful guy I felt blessed to be with him so soon after getting out of another relationship. Then eventually he started to become angry at me for everything such as if I drank the last of the milk in the fridge, If I had not cleaned the kitchen, If I downloaded a movie and forgot to rename it, If I had not put my makeup away etc. I am aware that this is not healthy and have told him that it is NOT okay to talk to me like this his responses were "If you did what I said then I would not yell" or "I am just an angry person" I dont believe that I am a stupid person but I do suffer from low self esteem I am a student who does not make enough money to leave. Also we have dogs and if I dont take care of them they stay in the kennel all day and do not get played with as he will not bother with them. People say I am stupid but I LOVE those dogs and they lov me back. He will not let me take them and I worry for them so I feel like I cant leave without finding them a home with me or with someone that will care for them. Im scared to go to I dont have very many friends and am in my late twenties and am not attractive he is very popular and whenever I hang with people they are all his friends. Can I get him to admit he needs help and stay or should I go and be alone and without my dogs?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2010): There is a simple answer to your question and that is you have to get out of this relationship. Don't try to get him help for his anger issues. They are his problem and unless he really wants help it will do no good. He is also controlling and shows every sign of being emotionally abusive. It would be better to be on your own than be treated in the terrible way you are now. As for the dogs, if he won't let you take them you must still go,don't use them as a reason to stay. Draw on whatever strength you can and leave and don't look back.
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