A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Should i dump my boyfriend ? I stayed at his place from thursday until yesterday and we argued on friday and saturday.we argued on friday because he wanted us to lose our virginity together,especially as it was his birthday.we couldnt though as i was on my period and also,we have been together on and off for afew years and i have always been too nervous to have full intercourse.he has complained because i am not very good at giving him a hand job and i tried giving him oral but i dont like it.he even said "i dont want a relationship with someone who only gives me a hand job.i might as well do it myself " and went mad coz i gave him oral and said i didnt like it.and said he was disappointed that we couldnt have intercourse on his birthday.and he said "you might be 25 in age but you arent mentally ".he doesnt understand about me having anxiety and even called me lazy.i told him about my plans to get my own council flat and maybe have counselling and support workers helping me but he said i shouldnt have help and should stand on my own feet.and he said its a s**t relationship because we dont have intercourse and he kicked a table across the room ,threw things at me,screamed at me and got right in my face as if he was going to hit me.i started crying too.usually he is very sweet and kind but he does have a short fuse.he's like my dad and my mum divorced my dad for that.what do you think ?
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (11 October 2011):
He should be dumped hon. NO man should force a woman to feel bad about not having sex. and no woman should make a man feel bad either.
a temper only gets worse and the reaction to not having sex is not a good sign.
I'm sorry.
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (10 October 2011):
I'm a little surprised that you could submit this at your ages.... BUT, I've been off base before about who knows what at what age.....
That said.... This guy you describe sounds uber-self-centered.... and I can't begin to imagine why you'd want to spend even one more minute with him.... HE, evidently, doesn't give a whit about YOU... and THAT is the recipe for a one-sided relationship in which ONE partner (you, in this case) has a crappy relationship... and the OTHER has a so-so relationship... but "so-so" is at the expense of the partner....
You can find a nicer B/F without looking very hard....
Good luck...
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2011): He sounds like an idiot. If a guy can't respect your choice not do have sex then he isn't worth fighting for, i'd just get rid and find someone who is worth your while if i'm honest. Don't ever be pressured into it, its something that only happens once and stays with you for the rest of your life- make it special and with somebody special. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, VSAddict +, writes (9 October 2011):
Leave this guy. He's a loser and isn't worth your time. He shouldn't be throwing tantrums just because you're nervous about sex. We are all nervous at some point, and he needs to get over himself. And he shouldn't be mad just because you don't like going down on him. We all have different preferences when it comes to what we like in the bedroom. This guy does not deserve to be with you. Find a guy who will understand your anxiety and won't complain if he has to wait for you. This guy obviously isn't it and it seems like he's only in it for the sex. You can find someone better. Hope this helps.
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