Should I cut my mother out of my life for ever?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Family, Troubled relationships

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Question - (31 July 2010)

2 Answers - (Newest, 31 July 2010)

A female age , anonymous writes:

I have a really hard life, including kids problems, health problems and all other aspects. Seemingly unrelated and I blamed it on bad fortune. As there is things I have done wrong, but nothing to deserve this outcome....

I cant get into details, because it would be a novel. It several ongoing, close to tragedy level life setbacks.

My mother lives in an other country, and whenever I talk to her she does not show any compassion, but instead she blames me for most of it. Her problem is that I'm not there for her and she feels abandoned. I tried to get her understanding many times, with no longtime peace. Because even she doesn't always attack me, she never really changes her mind. So from time to to time she tells it all. And I can't believe, this is my own mother. Actually it scares me, that my own mother talks to me that way, than what can i get from a stranger?

So my plan is to cut her out of my life, as it is now, more than 20 years and we cannot not find a solution. Every time she does that I'm destroyed for days. What do you think, can you cut out your own mother from your life? I know it is drastic, but what else choice do I have ? Thanks

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2010):

No easy answer on this,family can destroy us. YOU are your only solution, are you strong enough to stay detached emotionally and mentally yet keep your relationship going?

Or do you NEED to be free of the conflict to survive? you will never change others but you can change how YOU FEEL.

Try just sending the odd letter and xmas card then it's not too abrupt on either.

I hope life starts to treat you good, take care.

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