A
male
age
51-59,
*edjpd
writes: My girlfriend and I split up 6 weeks ago after 3 1/2 years together. Over the past few weekends we have met up talked and been intimate together. I have finally got it out of her that she is still angry with me for a row that happened last august when we had a major bust up - which I thought we had put behind us.She seems fearful of getting fully back together even though when we have been together recently things have been great. She has been fairly quite towards me since and has not given me an answer one way or the other as to whether we can give it another go - should I give her space to make up her mind, pursue her or just give up and try and move on again?
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male
reader, redjpd +, writes (16 May 2007):
redjpd is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all the advice.
I have let her know that I love her and am sorry for all the hurt I ever caused and hope that she can start trusting in me again soon. I'll just have to see how it goes.
A
male
reader, jamiejames +, writes (16 May 2007):
in my humble opinion you have to give her some space, make sure you have let her know how you feel about wanting to be with her (which im sure you have already done), then you need to find out how she feels...if the relationship is what she still wants she will get in touch with you, let her feel that your not chasing her all the time and then you know any contact with her was initiated by her.
while your still 100% there for her she has no fear of losing you, if she begins to feel she might lose you it may help to clarify how she really feels. of course it could go wrong and she may have already made up her mind that the relationship is over and the arguement might just be a good enough excuse...hopefully not and everything works out mate.
Rambling JJ
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A
female
reader, Midge +, writes (16 May 2007):
Well whatever the argument was about, she really needs to get over it first before you can get on with having a relationship. Giving her space to make up her own mind is the best thing.
Leave her to contact you, so that it doesnt seem as if you are running after her. If she still wants to be with you, she will contact you and make the first move to a great relationship. However, when you are together, maker her feel extra special so that she knows how much you love her and for her to feel that she really wants to be back with you.
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A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit +, writes (16 May 2007):
You do not mention what your fight was about. It must have been something BIG for her to be giving you this much drama. That being said, if you were in the wrong, give her space and the time for her to see that she can TRUST you again.
If the fight was something insignificant, then give her space and Date Other People. Life is too short for drama over the insignificant.
-FBK
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (16 May 2007):
Well she's already told you the problem here, she's upset about last year's argument. Therefore you need to deal with this before you can move on or get back together. Tell her you love her and you want her to be happy so you think you need to work out last year's argument. Don't let it escalate again, keep it cool and collected and don't raise your voice and allow it to become a fight again but deal with the issue and tell her you hope it'll make it easier for her to accept you again.
CD
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