A
male
age
36-40,
*ndy00
writes:Should I get back in touch with my first love?We split up over four years ago now after enduring a long distance relationship for two years. It was the single most difficult thing I have ever had to get over. I suffered for a very long time as many of you will know. I didn't see the break up coming and it really hit me hard (you can read all about it on my page if you like)Four years have past and so much has happened since then. I've completed college and university, fallen in love twice since then, and let's face it, I've grown up and so has she. We're adults now. A part of me is curious to know how life has treated her and what direction her life is taking her in... But another part of me is hesitant. I'm worried that even after the amount of time has past, it may open up old wounds. Wounds that took years to heal. Also, contacting her doesn't accomplish anything. It just means talking to her again, which used to be next to impossible for me. I'm not interested in getting back together with her though, and she has a boyfriend anyway which I understand is long-term, so I'm not considering that at all.So what do you think I should do? Is talking to her too much of a risk to myself? Will I ever be ready to do that? It's been four years. Is it possible I need more time? What do you think?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, cinc71  +, writes (19 August 2011):
 Hi,
I think you already know the answer to your question. Since you said it took a loooooooooong time to heal, why would you take the chance to open a old wound? Look ahead not behind. Someone great is waiting for you, you need to let go of the pass and look forward to a great future! Good luck :)
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