A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I was in a relationship for about a year with a man from another country. I just found out that he has a fiance waiting for him there. I had no idea, and now we are not seeing each other (obviously). Initially, he gave me her contact information and told me to tell her if I wanted. Now, he does not want me to. I know this will hurt his fiance, and I know that it will cause trouble for my ex-boyfriend and his family. However, I feel as though she has a right to know what happened, and I feel the need for revenge.Should I contact her and let her know what her fiance has been doing?
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009): No,this is not your mess, it's his. Your hands are clean as you had no idea that he was engaged to someone, so you have no need to feel in any way responsible.
If you knew this girl personally or she was your friend you'd be honour bound to do so, but as it stands there is nothing you can do but potentialy ruin peoples lives.
If I were you I'd throw out her details and break off contact with this guy, no good can come from having anything more to do with him, he sounds like a gutless "player" and she'll find out eventually.
You might wanna get revenge on him but it's not only him that stands to get hurt here, do you really want to screw up peoples lives just to get revenge?
I understand you're hurt and you have every reason to be but personally I wouldn't be able to look back on something like this with pride, if I'd stooped to petty revenge, it shows character to be able to resist that urge for immediate, temporary satisfaction.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009): If i were in your position and had his fiance's details and everything iwoud definately tell her. The thing you need to make sure of is that she doesnt take it out on you, its not your fault he has beena lying cheating scum-bag is it?!
Hope you manage to do this and get through it!
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A
female
reader, lilmissxx  +, writes (16 February 2009):
personally i would think of it as if i was her, and i would want to know because he could do it again to her and she finds out.
so if it was me id want to know
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