A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have a question. One of my best friends liked my girlfriend before we started dating. My girlfriend and I have been dating for 4 months and I have to travel a lot for my job. While I was gone on one of my trips, my friend hit on my girlfriend. My girlfriend doesn't like him at all and she is trying to avoid him at all costs but my girlfriend my best friend and I have similar friends. Should I confront him and tell him to stop hitting on my girlfriend?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2009): He was really drunk when he hit on her. While that is not an excuse in my book because he obviously knows that we are dating it is mitigating circumstances. I trust my girlfriend because a couple of my other friends saw it too and told me about it. I am pretty good friends with this guy but i don't know how long I can take this.
A
male
reader, Kepi  +, writes (23 February 2009):
 I agree with cerberus, to what extent did he 'hit' on your gf and what were the circumstances? You need to be aware of your facts before dealing with it, otherwise you could end up with a whole lot of trouble over nothing.
If you do feel the need to comment, don't make a big issue of it, a casual remark or similar should be sufficient, maybe even just remarking how much this girl means to you and your friend could well take the hint and let things go....
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 February 2009): First off how do you know he hit on her if you were away?
This kind of information is kind of important, you will hear a few, "yes, you should confront him" answers no doubt, but I can't honestly tell you to do that unless I know more.
Things like, how close are you and your friend?
How well do you know this girl, do you trust her(4 months isn't that long)?
Did anyone else see it happen, what did they make of it?
What were the circumstances, was he drunk, is he a natural flirt, did he actually mean anything by it?
If you don't know the answer to these questions I'd find out before you go creating problems that might not be there, I wouldn't confront him thats not the right way to go about it, better to look for some answers before you jump to conclusions.
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