A
female
age
36-40,
*storeyfire
writes:hey guys well i was having this situation where me and my housemate who was living with me for the summer made out a few times, we were really good friends with a lot in common and he told me all about his ex who broke his heart. However I thought he was over her when he got with me, eventually one night he was hinting at having sex so I told him I really liked him. He responded by telling me i was pretty lovely amazing etc. but he couldn't do long distance(he was moving back to college about 3 hours away from me) and couldn't do relationships. I was really upset and a few days later when he was moving out even more so. He left me a note saying keep in touch so one night about a month later him but he called back and we talked a lot and he said he would meet me when i will be down near his place for a college seminar. he said he wouldn't leave it so long next time but i haven't heard anything since and am going mad wondering if he will turn up or not. PLUS I found out his ex was in his college town recently and I'm really worried he might have got back with her. He had said i love you to her and she said it in a roundabout way according to him but then he told me i don't think i did love her. They WERE ONLY TOGETHER 4 MONTHS OR SO AND HE thinks it was only about sex for her.. I don't know. I'm supposed to be meeting him 5th of November (3 weeks) and was thinking about ringing him the wee before to check hes def coming. i am really confused as to what i should do or how i should act when of it i see or speak to him...
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his ex, I love you, long distance Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Krissy_Captivate +, writes (14 October 2009):
 Well hun to be honest you seem more sure about what type of guy he is, just be aware of things incase anything happens in the future, it would be horrible for you to get hurt againKrissy x
A
female
reader, 5storeyfire +, writes (14 October 2009):
5storeyfire is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks guys really helps talking about was feeling so bad til i read ur posts, the relationship with his ex finished last february and he appeared to be over it at first but not so sure now. he did NOT tell me up front he didnt want a relationship,he had kissed me thre times before he told me that, he had said that when we were just friends he didnt want that but as far as im concerned he shouldve said it again before gettting involved with me..coward. hes not the worst or the best guy, he had problems after his ex finished it but he hurt me even tho he knew how awful it would feel.
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A
female
reader, MAIDinHeaven  +, writes (14 October 2009):
You need to get in touch with him and get a confirmation. If we do that in business with appointments, what more for a matter of the heart?
I suggest you close this issue and meet some nice young man who knows he wants you in his life and doesn't use a 3 hour distance as an excuse (my fiance and i live 10 hours away by plane so i know distance is no good excuse, he calls me everyday, we plan trips together, etc) I've been exactly where you are, and I did stupid things for the guy before I was forced to make the decision to tear myself away and move on.
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A
female
reader, Krissy_Captivate +, writes (14 October 2009):
Well, i hope everything goes well for you hun :) sorry for misunderstanding, i guess my head's not in the right place today lol
x
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A
female
reader, 5storeyfire +, writes (13 October 2009):
5storeyfire is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you guys ! id say i will call and see... just to clarify for krissy he told his ex he loved her while they were still together not recently, he hasnt had contact with her since she told him not to contact her all summer at the start of the summer(i had no interest in him then) i guess she had the right idea b/c hes obviously no good. he also told me MORE THAN ONCE "im not looking for a girlfriend but if the right girl came along...." what a liar! so he would be a terrible boyfriend i know that now, im not expecting anything like that we were just such good friends its hard not to have that now. again i guess hes a lousy friend as well if he can treat me like that. i think its a classic case of liking someone who is bad for you thNKS AGAIN FOR THE HELP:)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 October 2009): He has clearly told you No Relationship so I would suggest working on acceptance instead.
If the guy is obviously seeing someone else, why would you want to put anyone including yourself through the emotional turmoil?
I say do not call and move on. If it was meant to be he will connect with you. It does not sound like he is into you. Sorry.
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A
female
reader, Krissy_Captivate +, writes (13 October 2009):
Well, if he told his ex that he loves her, then it's best to stay out of the situation, if he told you all of that then told her that he loves her..it's not worth being in a relationship with him as it will only end up in heartache unless he is genuinally over her.I don't see the problem in calling him a week before to double check he's coming, but if i were you i wouldn't ask him about his ex..just see how things go when you both meet upI hope this helpsKrissy x
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