A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my Girlfriend for 10 months now. We have recently started college and had big changes in our relationship due to less time with eachother.Throughout the holidays, I had her to myself. She's not very sociable so she didn't really speak to many people except for me. The holidays were long (starting from May till September) so we spent a lot of time together.Now we have started college (a friendly atmosphere) my girlfriend has had a real confidence boost by meeting loads of new poeple. I couldn't be happier for her.She oftenly makes jokes about cheating on me with other guys and has come close to it on one of her holidays with her friends. She had been texting a boy she had met on holiday (who she is still texting to this day) and I found out that she had gone on holiday and pretended to be single for the week.I now fear that my girlfriend will find lust or romance in all these new types of people we are meeting. She has been invited to lots of new parties (she's partying right now, at a hot tub party) and she is very easily influenced, under people and under alcohol.Should I be worried? I wish I wasn't. And is there anything you could suggest to overcome these worries?
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2007): Well sorry to tell you this, but you should be worried. I think your gf doesn't want a serious relationship right now because she feels that she could be missing out all the fun. What you can do is to set limits. Be clear on what you wouldn't accept (party+alcohol, new male-friends crossing the line, etc.)Also don't just hang out, make dates with her, specially fun-racy dates. Make her feel like she's got a new bf in you. She's changing so do you. Good luck!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2007): You should be worried. It sounds like she's testing you to see how you'd react with her jokes about cheating, meaning she's very tempted to do it. You should be extremely upset that she would pretend to be single for a week. Have you discussed that with her? Does she know how much it bothered you? Does she care? It doesn't sound like it.
She seems very unfaithful. If my girlfriend pretended to be single for a week, I would strongly consider breaking up with her.
You didn't state very much information on your current relationship with her. Do you communicate a lot about things? Does she know you feel worried about her cheating? I would try to have a long conversation with her about it, letting her know exactly how I feel about everything and see how she reacts. If she doesn't care, she doesn't really love you. Good luck.
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