A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm a little aggravated with my boyfriends girl best friend. So my boyfriend and his girl best friend has been friends way before we started dating. They hangout or see each other every other day or every day. She has told him she likes him but he told her he didn't feel the same. She doesn't like me and I have no idea why I've never talked her or anything. She doesn't want me around them when they hangout or see each other. My boyfriend on the other hand has asked me if I wanted to tag along and go with him when they hang out or see each other but I always say no. Anyway she texts him everyday all day. If he don't text her back she texts him again until he texts back which is really getting annoying to me sometimes he even gets annoyed. It's like she needs him every minute of everyday! We can't even watch a movie without her texting 3 times or calling! She buys him stuff but then he has to pay her back. I feel like she's trying to make this a competition between Me and her. It's really pissing me off! I have a guy best friend as well but he don't text or call me constantly and doesn't need me every single day. Last night he had turn his phone off just to ignore her. I feel like maybe she's trying to get me to break up with him so she can have him. Who knows. But does she really need him every single day . Her mom got put in the hospital today and she called and told him. A few hours passed by and she called him after they had been texting all day. He didn't answer instead he went outside and called her back. Then came back in and said he had to leave to go to the hospital to be there for her . I got really upset and he asked if I wanted to go and I said no. Should I be concerned about how they are acting?
View related questions:
best friend, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, amandanash  +, writes (21 September 2013):
He really doesn't seem interested in her. They're close friends, but he is clearly annoyed by how she acts by constantly calling him and what not. Unfortunately he needs to be the one to tell her to back off. He needs to tell her that her calling and texting is a little obsessive, especially when he's with you. Unfortunately, if you said this to her, it would only cause more problems i feel. He does need to be with her in the hospital, it's good he's supporting her. It's a good thing he invites you out to hang out! That means he really has nothing to hide. He wants you to meet her and be around. You should go once in a while. You guys might become more comfortable with each other. My boyfriend has ALOT of girl friends. A LOT. And I used to dislike many of them. There are a few now that I really really like, after hanging out with them and meeting them in a non threatening situation.
A
female
reader, Aunty Babbit  +, writes (20 September 2013):
 I think if your b/f wanted to be with her he would and he could. She has already told him that she's interested in him but he replied that he didn't feel the same way.
So I think, from his point of view, no, he doesn't fancy her.
She however clearly has strong feelings for him and is horrible to you because you have what she desires also she'll see you as a threat to her friendship with him and think you're taking him away from her.
The difficulty you will face, in my opinion, is tackling this because she is a very close friend and they have a lot of history together.
I think if you give her enough rope, she'll hang herself. The more she's calling etc the more possessive and needy she's getting and the more strangled your b/f will feel.
If your b/f starts blowing off your dates or plans to see her or talk to her then it would be reasonable to say (as nicely as possible) that you know she is his best friend but doesn't he think it's strange to spend quite so much time together or on the phone with each other.
If he can't see it you'd have to point out that he's spending more time with her than he does with you and when you two are together, she's always disturbing that time and does he think that those are the actions of friend.
At the moment with her Mum in hospital her need for his support would actually be genuine but at other times, no, I think she's jealous of you.
I hope this helps AB x
...............................
|
