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Should I be suspicious of my hubby's new guy friend who's buying him underwear and gifts?

Tagged as: Friends, Marriage problems, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 January 2009) 6 Answers - (Newest, 11 January 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 41-50, anonymous writes:

My husband has a new male friend - and he often socialises with him. My husband is very popular at work and I'm happy for him.

It's the nature of this friendship that worries me though - not the fact he's friends with the guy (I've only met him once, and he seems like a great guy!) - his behaviour towards this guy doesn't seem like a "normal" friendship.

He's bought this guy designer suits, champagne, a and packs of briefs and boxer shorts from Marks and Spencers, Top Man and River Island.

I've tried to find out why my husband does this, but he just ranted at me and said it's nothing to worry about.

It seems odd - why would a guy buy another guy clothes and underwear as presents? I just don't get it!

Isn't it a bit odd what he's doing?? how should I deal with this without him getting angry?

Jennifer

View related questions: at work, underwear

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2009):

I guarantee you that heterosexual men certainly do not buy each other underwear (or clothes for that matter). You already know what is really going on but you just don't want to admit it.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2009):

Wow... sounds VERRRRY suspicious. Not to worry you but that sounds like something's going on - the fact he ranted at you and got angry makes it seem even more likely that he's cheating on you. He may be secretive and angry becuase he's finding it hard to deal with hurting you and finding out that he's gay. Not prying but does he like anal? If he expresses a new interest in it then he MAY be with this man in a sexual manner, but that's not the only sign. Why don't you ask him sensitively? It may be the only way you can find out and do what's best for you. Good luck. x

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A female reader, NurseBetty85 United States +, writes (9 January 2009):

NurseBetty85 agony auntIt may seem suspicious because you don't know this man

verry well to judge him. Now I have a female friend that gives me money when I need it and even buy me things. We are both straight with boyfriends so I know she's not coming on to me. I just see her as a good friend thats thoughful and sharing.

I think the best way to get to know this man is to see if he would like to spend time with you and your husband. Like to go see a show, out to dinner or even a movie. Now if they keep saying no, then there may be something to hide.

Because being around you and in your face, they may feel guilty.

Don't stress out to much..It can be Harmless.

Good Luck, TakeCare!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2009):

The guy is giving my husband designer suits, champagne, briefs and boxer shorts - not the other way around.

He's even bought my husband fine Italian food as well and cooked him an Italian meal whilst I was out at work!

My husband's never shown any attraction to other males before.

Jennifer

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A female reader, Miss Potter United Kingdom +, writes (9 January 2009):

Miss Potter agony auntIt does sound odd indeed. Although I do have a friend who I am very fond off and we have known each other for years, I do give her presents but nothing too kinky.

Underware and champaigne presents sound like it could have a sexual underlining.

I would be concerned. Have your husband previously been attracted to other males?

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A female reader, ezfeeling United States +, writes (9 January 2009):

Its time to turn in super sleuth my dear.... And make sure you use protection, I'd be willing to bet your guy is on the "down low".....

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