A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hello,I am a 33 year old woman who has been dating a 40 year old man for 4 months now. We spend every weekend together and, two weeks ago, we went away for a holiday for a week. During the holiday, I told him that I was falling in love with him. He said he hoped I would understand that he is a slow burner and needed to be with someone for a long time before falling in love. I said of course, and that I hadn't said it just to hear him say it back. However, I now feel really silly and very vulnerable. I've noticed that he never pays me compliments or seems overly keen to see me, and I am wondering whether he actually likes me to the same extent as I like him. I've got nothing to go on and no way of knowing whether he is with me just because he doesn't have a great social life and therefore would stay in every weekend if he was single, or whether he really is a 'slow burner'. I'm not sure what to do next, whether to back off and let him chase me a bit, or wether to keep on as am (being keen to see him, calling him etc). Thanks for reading this, any advice would be great - I am so out of the loop with this dating lark as it's been a while since I was last with someone new!! x Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2008): He may be a slow burner but I doubt it. It really seems to me that you are his BTN. Which stands for better than nothing. I would move on if I were you.
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (24 September 2008):
Well there is never anything wrong with playing a little hard to get.
Leave him alone and let him make the first move for a while.
The worst thing that can happen is that you find out that you need to move on and find a guy who is a bit more open to his feelings.
Good Luck!! xx
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