A
female
age
30-35,
*NNUCENT
writes:My boyfriend cheated on me with his baby's mom who is pregnant and will be having the baby in 3 weeks. This happened two months ago. Then I found out and also she confronted me later about 1 month later. I love him dearly so I had took him back and he promised never to do it again. Then we agreed to not seperate, but not see each other or talk to each other for a week because we both needed things that we needed to do. We didn't make it to the two weeks because we had to talk to each other. Then about a week later and accusing me of cheating and saying that I'm trying to move on.Okay we resolved the problems that night. In that same night I found out the girl that he said was his male cousin was actually a girl that he was talking to. He continued to talk to her. Then about 4 days on my birthday 2/17 I found out that he had fucked her 4 times. I got so angry and I broke up with him. I was really hurt because he was accusing me of doing it and he was actually cheating. He wantes me back and I really want him back but I don't know if I should. His mom and cousins are very angry at him and are treating him like shit because he hurt me. He cries to me and begs for me to come back to him. I made the suggestion that we can be friends but he doesn't want to be friends. I really love him and want him back but I don't know if I should take him. Please, I need help.
View related questions:
broke up, cheated on me, cousin, move on Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2008): No i have been throughit and seriouslythese kind of men dont change NEVER !!!!!!!!. They will put u throughall the guilt in the world and make ur confidence low if u accept it once its more likely u will accept it againand again make a stand , everyone deserves a faithful partner , good luck .
A
male
reader, chlez83  +, writes (21 February 2008):
You are too young to be dragged into such complications.Believe me you can get over him and find someone you can fall in love with.Cut all ties with him coz i can assure you that that guy's perfecting the art of being a cheater and the older he grows,the better he becomes.You won't even catch him next time.However,i know when a girl's in love,it's hard for her 2 listen and i wouldn't be surprised if you got back with him.Never get involved with a guy with a child especially if he's young.
Take care.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2008): I am in the same situation as you. My fiancee cheated on me months ago and he said it was one time and nothing happened. Then i find out from the other girl that she's pregnant and its his baby. I also got harrassed by this girl. I DUMPED him! Yes, i love him with all my heart and we were perfect for each other (6 yrs) but i couldnt stay with him after what he did. He kept lying to me even after i found out and I knew it would just get worse (we werent even married yet). As of now, he contacts me every single day but I have to look out for myself. And instead of his mom and family blaming him they blamed ME. I realized they are a messed up family and they lookout for each other no matter how disgusting they are.
Dont stay with him. You're still young and have your whole life to look forward to with better guys that will treat you like the beautiful queen you are. I know its hard letting him go (after several months I'm still healing/trying to move on). Nobody said it was easy. Your main focus now is your happiness and to do what's right even though you know it will be difficult.
Believe in yourself and dont let him treat u like a doormat! Good luck and we are here for you!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2008): Hello
I just wanted to tell you that you do not deserve to be cheated on. No one does. This is a very complicated situation. You are so young and you should not. I repeat SHOULD NOT put up with it. Trust me, I've been there before. He is not gonna change. He is immature and young and childish. Don't take your feelings for granted. You are very young and I'm sure there are tons of guys out there that will appreciate you. PLEASE be smart and leave him alone. It will hurt but it will be worth it in the long run. Also if you are having sexual intercourse with him please use protection. The last thing you want is to have a baby in this kind of situation or an STD. Good luck!
...............................
A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (21 February 2008):
 Men do not often change, young men included. It is what it is. Take it or leave it for what it is, because it will almost certainly continue.
...............................
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (21 February 2008):
 How real is your love for him?
If yours is a true and real love, you will forgive him and take him back.
Or
You can forgive him and move on without him.
If you cannot live without him , then pick the first choice.
If you think he is nauseating , then you know what to do....
...............................
A
female
reader, farrah777  +, writes (21 February 2008):
I had a friend who was being cheated on by her boyfriend, and he accused her of cheating also, it's a way of the guy trying to make you feel bad and like you've done something wrong when you haven't, he's the asshole.
It's hard cause you both really like each other, but in the long run you need to think about this, if he's cheated that many times and continued to lie then he will only keep repeating the pattern.
Remember cheating is a choice, not something he was force to do but what he decided to do on he's own. He may want to be with you but he has a problem and needs to work it out.
You can either move on and find someone that will treat you better and have more respect for you, or you can stay with someone that keeps hurting you. Relationships are built on trust, don't put yourself through anymore of this.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2008): in my oppinion while this is forgivable act i wouldnt take him back he cheated on you once said he wasnt going to do it again then had sex with another girl 4 times?in my oppinion he has cheated on you 5 times he made a horrible mistake and he needs to come to terms with what he did so forgive him and say you just want to be friends if he refuses to just be friends then dont be his girlfriend or his friend leave him be to dwell on the horrible mistakes he made in my oppinion he doesnt deserve you nobody who cheats on someone deserves the person they cheated on.whatever your decision good luck
-michael
...............................
|
