A
male
age
30-35,
*addybear
writes: Hey guys, please help me! I recently broke up with my gf of 5 years due to my gf was in love with some one else. The problem is she is now with this fella and has been for a while, yet she stopd at my house and we ended up makin love. (With out using protection) This is makin me so confused and dnt no wat to do. Im 25 and my ex gf is 23. Was 2getha for 5 years, I really love her and want her back. Please help!
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female
reader, PerhapsNot +, writes (7 January 2012):
She's your soul mate and you want to marry her? REALLY? You've painted a pretty little picture there, but you're forgetting the big picture. You DUMPED your little soul mate because she was/is in LOVE with ANOTHER MAN. Does that sound like a soul mate to you, or even a good girlfriend? Sure as hell doesn't sound like it to me, or to anyone else with half a brain.
Listen, you may miss her and you may be jealous that she is already dating and shagging some other dude right now, but it doesn't change the fact that she doesn't love you. If she did, you wouldn't have broken up with her to begin with! You need to acknowledge the big elephant in the room here. How is the situation going to be fixed if you were to get back together? Want to break up again because you can't handle her being in love with someone else? Do you want to marry someone who loves someone else? If you do, go back to her.
A
male
reader, Daddybear +, writes (7 January 2012):
Daddybear is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI have tried to talk to her, but all she says is "don't know". She texts me all the time, when I don't reply she texts again until I do. Im so confused, I dont know what to do, I feel that we are soul mates and I want to marry her! :'(
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (7 January 2012):
It sounds to me like she is in a very messed up place and just does not know who or what she wants at the moment. Having sex unprotected was a very silly thing to do on both your part, you should get yourself checked for STI's especially since you know she is with someone else.
Five years is a long time to be together, so am sure that yes she does still have some feelings left for you but she also had feelings for this other guy and my guess is that she is unsure which one of you she wants to be with.
Talk to her and ask her why she made love with you that night, tell her how confused it has made you and how you are feeling. Ask her what it is she wants. If she does not want to get back with you, then you need to let her go and drop contact with her so you don't keep hurting yourself.
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