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*hio is 4 lovers616
writes: Where do ? start? Well I'm 16 and been in love since I was 11. I know I was young but the girl was 10 at the time. So it's 2005 now. Six years and I love her even more. She says she loves me but doesn't take her feelings serious. I feel like she has all my feelings and I have none of hers. We're really close friends now. She sees me as a brother, but I see her as the love of my life. What should I do? Need help bad. Reply to this Question
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reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (18 May 2005):
 Unfortunately, it's not often that relationships go the way that you want them to. This is the case for just about everyone, so you're not alone.I don't doubt that what you feel is the strongest of emotions for this girl, but given the conditions that you've outlined, you might have to let your head rule your heart for a while. You say that she doesn't return your feeling, and that's going to start to hurt, if it doesn't already. Wanting her and desiring her and longing for her - as you've already seen - doesn't make her want you more, if she's not already interested in you, romantically. This is something you have to accept and remind yourself... 100 times a day, if necessary. It'll start to sink in over time. You need to pull away from constantly desiring someone who says she isn't interested, because (and I recommend people get this phrase tattooed inside their eyelids) You Can't Make Someone Love You. They either do... or they don't. This girl doesn't.The fact that you're friends is an excellent start, though. At least she knows you and cares about you in a platonic way, so eventual romance is not completely out of the picture. I just recommend that you scale back the loving fantasies for now. They're not getting you anywhere, except deep inside Heartache City, are they?Why not consider going out with other girls? Just friendly dates and without an aim of replacing the girl you love. You might have some fun with them, you might make some new friends and have new experiences, but there's also the possibility that your girl might see you in more of a boyfriend role when she sees that you appeal to other girls, too.Sometimes just the fact of other women noticing your manly charms can make the girl of your dreams sit up and take notice. Please note, I am NOT suggesting you try to make the girl you want "jealous". What I am saying is, spend time with other girls, have some fun, take your mind off the love of your life for a while... and there's a chance she might start to take you seriously after all.Good luck!
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