A
male
age
36-40,
*eadokie21
writes:My g/f and i are on a break for a reason, i need help with this please.. I asked her to marry me, she said yes to me, Then i talked to her parents and they might have talked her out of it or not i do not know. She had told me it wasnt her parents it was me i was rushing it.. She said yes i though it was what she wanted she said it was at the time, but its a fairytale and now shes back to reality, she said she doesnt not want to get engaged. I am willing to let it pass i dont have top be engaged to love her. And now she said she wanted some space i gave it to her for the week like she asked. She talked to me the next night and said she was lost, needing some time and wants a break but reassured me everything would be ok. I asked how do i know it will be, Said she loves me to much, and if she didnt want to be with me she would have been gone by now. I agree she would. And i am going to give her, her space once again, just a break is new to me never had this before, Im wonder cause its hard to cope with, She says shes going to come back exact words that came out of her mouth. How long should I wait for her?.. I would wait a lifetime... But In my heart it shouldnt take that long to decide u want someone.
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female
reader, abbie959 +, writes (20 May 2008):
You asked her to spend the rest of her life with you. When she took a minute to look at that realistically it obviously freaked her out. She probably had other things planned in her life to do before she was married with a family. Give her a few weeks to short things out. She'll decide if she can continue on and if she can't it's better that you found out now, rather than wasting 15 years of marriage with someone who didn't love you the same way. She's being smart and you should love and respect her for that. I literally know of 15 + people who have gotten engaged or are married now all of which are in their early 20s. It seems like a lot of these girls just want to get married to be married, not for the long haul. You should feel grateful that she isn't that type of person. You'd be miserable in the long run. If she's the one, she'll come around and if not, you're a young guy and you'll definitely find someone else out there.
A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (20 May 2008):
 Hi mate,
when I looked at your age 18-21 I felt like cheering your girlfriend for having the good sense not to jump into marriage.
Somebody has given her some sound advice, and she has taken it. You both will change dramatically over the coming years so getting married at your age is insane.
Your job is to convince her now that your proposal was a moment of madness as you now realise you are far too young to get married as you both have your whole life ahead of you.
She might buy this, but in the interim you have scared her off. Take things easy and give her some time, she will probably come around - but only if you leave out the marriage stuff.
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