A
male
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anonymous
writes:I go to my local pub with my mum and dad once a week for the karaoke. A couple of months ago, this girl came in with her boyfriend and another guy, but was totally flirting with me. My mum and dad have known this girl as her and her boyfriend go into the pub around once a month. My mum says she is usually very shy and have never seen her act like that around another guy before.My mum was in disbelief as to how she was acting. She kept coming over hugging me, etc. I just laughed it off.The next month, (last week) she came in again, with her boyfriend and some other guy. This time, she was much more forward and kept trying to drag me up to dance. There was another girl in the pub who kept also comng over to me, saying "Ellie wants you to dance". I eventually said to her that I felt uncomfortable dancing as her bf was stood right there. He said it was ok and encouraged me to dance with her, which I eventually did.Whilst we were dancing, I told her that I felt uncomfortable, but she said, "its ok, I can go with who I want and so can he" What did she mean by this?Later that night, Ellie was standing at the bar, he bf to her left and the other guy to her right. This other guy was talking to Ellie, but had his hand on her arse with her bf sitting less than 2 feet away. he could see what was going on.What are this girls intentions? She told me her address while we were dancing.My mum said jokingly, "she probably wants a threesome with you and her bf" I am afraid she may be right.This girl is very attractive and has a young child to her bf. She is around 25, I am a bit older. She does not act like a slut or dress provocatively at all, but the way she seems to be with me is weird.
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flirt, shy, threesome Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWhoah, a 3 way isn't what i want at all, so I am not looking for permission.
I just wanted to know if I was reading the signals correctly or if I was on a totally different page.
So I think I can safely say my mum was right then, albeit in jest?
A
male
reader, maxsteel86 +, writes (13 November 2006):
 From what I got from your message, it seems they're probably in an open relationship. Its up to you if you wanna go ahead with it or not
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2006):
Thats part of whats so annoying about it- they play it so there is deniability if they want to back off.
That why I suggest bringing it out in the open with the guy. If you "Wtf, dude?" him he either has to put a stop to it, or admit what their game is.
Oh he could try a "its cool, she just likes to dance" but then you say "I'm just telling you man its making you look bad. People are talking about her". He cant get mad at you, and its clear the game is up and he's got to get some control of her, or he looks bad.
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A
female
reader, creamepie  +, writes (13 November 2006):
they want you
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI just dont want to ask outright, in case they are like, Its only a dance. I am just unsure of whether I am misreading signals, because there have been no sexual remarks or suggestions at all. I just dont wanna look like a fool.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2006):
It up to you but this kind of toying with me would get my blood up.
Are they or arent they? Do they want a three way or do they just want to watch each other play single in the bar and have people on the hook and panting after them, and then go home with each other and get off on the 'naughtiness' of it.
Nice for them, but I didnt ask to be cast in their little bar pickup tableau.
Enough of this mysteriousness. I'd go up to the guy and say "Dude, WTF is going on with your gf? She is hitting on me". Call him out on it.
BTW, if you wrote in to see if you had permission to 'go for it'... I wouldnt. The girl is someones mother, and the thing will be the talk of the bar your mom and dad go to. I am sure that you can find of hot fling at a different bar if necessary.
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2006): If you don't like all of this then don't go there. Keep well away. I think it is a bedroom game that both of them are playing. The more you take part the more they will think you want to go ahead. It's up to you. Run now if you don't want to get hurt and someone will. Take care xx
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female
reader, HONEST JULIE +, writes (13 November 2006):
 tell her that you are not intrested and that she may be embarassing herself and if her boyfriend is egging her on he doesn't love her like he should
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A
female
reader, Lemonpixie +, writes (13 November 2006):
 Seems like they may even be Polyamorous. If you feel uncomfortable dancing with this girl while he bf is right there, chances are you wont want a threesome or get involved in polyamory or swinging or whetever there deal is. Tell her you are not interested, or that you have someone else at the moment and you are monogamous. Whatever the deal is she obviously is being passed around in ways among these guys she brings in with her bf... i think it may all be a bit much for some people
Definition of Polyamory:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyamory
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2006): Step on her toes, trip over your feet, and bump into other couples as you dance. If she still wants you after that, you'd best surrender to her (and his) desires.
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