A
female
age
41-50,
*oxy Roxie
writes:My friend is having a really bad break up break down. I've been a good friend by giving her my shoulder and ears. Putting somewhat my life on hold to help her out of this one. But this relationship really took over her, making her a really heartless person. She has become really bitter. She is trying to get back on track by dating, but I feel she has not found her self yet. She has become someone different. Lost fucos in her life and kids. I love her very much, she is also my ex, yet when I try to help her she brings out the fact that I'm not with her. I know that, that's not the reason why I help, I don't want a relationship with her, I just love her very much and don't want to see her hurt. But lately she has become a really bad friend. Leaving me hanging, when we've made plans. She has hurt me, so much that I just want to give up on her. Even if she needs me. Before all this we had very good moments as friends and lovers. I looked up to her, she is smart, out going, strong, a fighter single mom. I respect her very much. But I got sick and tired of the way she treats me. I had a really bad snap yesterday, that I said many hurtful things to her. Something I had never done. Even of what I said, is nothing of the many hurtful thing's she has said to me, yet, I feel bad! What should I do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2008): In all honesty, you should feel bad because you have now stooped to her level of behavior. Moreover, this bad behavior is the whole reason you are even writing on this site. Instead of helping her, she has now brought you down. It is inevitable that the people we keep around us will rub off on us.There is no need to do something as drastic as cutting her out of your life completely. Why not just take some space but let her know you still care. When you want to hang out with her, invite her to do something fun so that you all cannot just sit around and get more and more bitter ... go bowling, play putt-putt, ENGAGE so that you are distracted. Instead of focusing on all the bitter drama of the past, formulate solutions which will help you both get better.
A
female
reader, Foxy Roxie +, writes (13 November 2008):
Foxy Roxie is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHello out there, I just want to say that thanks to the technology we have know in days I ran into my ex-girlfriend from high school. She was my high school sweetheart. As that said, we know that's when we get are young heart broken. My problem with this is that I'm a lesbian and she is bi, as most of my girlfriends have been. I don't know why I always end up crushing more the bi-sexual girl and end up with a broken heart. I cheated on my ex with a woman, I know, I messed up. I was young. A year later she cheat on me with a dude. Should I give this a 2nd round? And should I stop dating bi sexual woman? HELP!
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A
female
reader, danniele0161  +, writes (13 November 2008):
give he some space, u dont have to fall out but just stay away for abit until she realises she needs a good friend like you around. then im sure she will realise and apologise when she knows she can't take you for granted good luck x
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