A
male
age
36-40,
*rianinFL321
writes:This can definitely fall under the age difference section. I am currently dating a lady twice my age and at 24 that would make her 48. She is absolutely gorgeous, but I understand that will slowly decline in the not so distant future. Thats not a problem. I am not a superficial person and if it weren't for all of the things we have in common and enjoy doing together we wouldn't be together today. The love, trust and care is there, but unfortunately this relationship is getting growing due to a couple of concerns of hers. The age gap is an issue because she is worried I will soon not be attracted. She also doesn't want to drag me through menopause. Her biggest issue, being a mother is that since I don't have kids and she can't have any more. She wants me to experience this joy and although I am sure it would be a fabulous process to take part in, being a father is not something that is on my "to do before I die list".I have explained this to her over and over, but this issue and this issue alone seems to be destroying an otherwise beautiful, healthy and all but perfect relationship. What can I do to convince her that her being happy equals me being happy, before I lose the best thing that has ever happened to me? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, BrianinFL321 +, writes (26 March 2009):
BrianinFL321 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanks for the replies so far. There was an editorial error I forgot to correct in the second paragraph. Where it says getting growing it was supposed to say growing dim. To the first poster, we have also discussed adoption and the outcome was I wasn't concerned with that either. Even if I were, she wouldn't want to take part in it due to already having four kids and by the time we pulled the trigger on that decision she would be well over 50. To the second poster, she is very wise. Probably one of the wisest people I have ever met. Has a master's degree in nursing and has already owned a very successful business. We have tried to part ways a couple times, but I think I am holding on much more than she is which leads me to believe there isn't much that can be done to salvage this. Nothing short of her waking up to an epiphany at least. When you have something so incredible it makes it easy to cling to such small beacons of hope.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2009): I wanted to reply to your post. I'm in a similar relationship. I have been dating a woman 12 years older than me for 15 months now. Both of those issues you mentioned have been brought up many times. I am in love with her and she wants to be too but she scarred of the age issue. That one day i wake up and not want her anymore. And the fact she cannot have more children. Shes tells me its something i should experience. But we discussed the possibility of abdoption if we was to make this relationship something serious.
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A
female
reader, 48years  +, writes (26 March 2009):
 She is very wise in terms of seeing what your youth cannot see. If she were just a wee bit wiser, she'd let you go. Not because you're not enough of a man for her, not because she doesn't love you, not because society may have it's own opinions, but because she DOES love you.
Go rent the movie, "Harold and Maude". It's about a may/december love affair.
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