A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been dating my girlfriend for 2 years. Things were going well and everything was working our perfectly in the relationship. Over the past few months we had not gotten to see each other very much, I was starting a very high level/time consuming job and she was finishing her last semester of college. We both had a lot going on and we were in different locations. We did not get to see each other enough and when we did, we never had time for just her and I. So 2 weeks ago she told me that the relationship was starting to feel like too much work and that she did not feel the spark. I explained to her that the few visit is and no one on one time was about to be over because she was graduating in a few weeks and my job will be less hectic. She was unsure and said that she thought it was over. We agreed to meet last weekend and it was the first time we had gotten alone time in a few months. The day went great and she did not want me to leave, she wanted to lay down in her car together, kiss, basically everything that couples in love do. I contacted her the next day and she said she was confused and that she did not want to send mixed signals etc. So, this week we talked a few times and we were supposed to talk last night. After our conversation last night she told me she was very confused. She said that she "does not want to be single and live that life but also does not know if she wants a relationship." When she said that I proposed that we just take a full month break and not talk. She agreed but she made it clear that she does not want us to see other people. I agreed and as much as it hurt we decided to take the break. Before we got off the phone she started crying and said that she will miss me, she refused to hang up the phone and she finally made me hang up.So we are going to talk again in a month and until then we are just going no contact. She said she really hopes she can figure it out and wants thing to come back to normal. Does anyone have any idea as to what is going on in her head?
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female
reader, justnicky +, writes (1 May 2011):
 well me being a girl as well i have a pretty good idea. i think. you said that you agreed to take a break but after she seemed upset and hurt. you also said you have been with her for 2 years. i am getting the idea that she is just so used to your presence in your life and when you both agreed to take a break it probably hit her that her life was about to change greatly. i think she still cares a great deal for you but does not like the distance that has grown between the 2 of you. as for advice on fixing this problem all i can say is time. wait it out. if she calls and wants to get back with you then make sure you make at least a little time for her. yes i realize this maybe difficult but the outcome will be worth it. if she does not call you, i know it may hurt you but she decided it wasn't worth her time. meaning you will be well on your way to find a different one. but don't rush into anything. hope some of this was helpful and i'm sorry if it wasn't. i hope everything works out.
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