A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:She says that she will not fight for any man, including me. This makes me feel so disposable, insignificant, and unwanted. Am I over-reacting?So here is the history on us:A number of years ago I was engaged to Solange but our egos got the best of us and I left. I was young and had no comprehension of how to act, be, do, etc. Solange had a lot of anger and we fought like mad. But we also had an incredible, deep love...well we still do.After not seeing or speaking with each other for years, we recently came back in to each other's lives and our love for each other seems deeper and stronger than ever before...so it seems!Lately we have been having problems. We don't argue the way we used to but I have noticed something that is alarming to me. I have noticed over the last few weeks that it seems that she is pulling away a bit. She has told me that she is scared of the situation and fears that I will leave again. We have discussed this and the need for patience, compassion, acceptance, and love on both parts. Yesterday we had a misunderstanding and it got to the point where she said that she was done. To this I responded that if she wasn't willing to hear me out and was willing to quit so easily, that I was done too. We bantered back and forth a bit and then I asked her, "why aren't you willing to fight for me?" She flat out proclaimed, "I won't fight for any man!". Well I lost it and said that I am not just ANY man, I was allegedly the man that she is in love with - we are made for each other! She just repeated again she she just can't and won't do it.I have told her in the past that my biggest fear was that she would be able to just walk away and not think twice. I know for a fact that on the inside this would hurt her but it seems that she would be willing to do this rather than fight for us.I know the situation is more complicated than this and that there are two sides to the story. We have professed our love for one another and we are working through our misunderstandings. Her statement about not willing to fight for us though has me seriously rattled. I guess I need help thinking on this...thoughts?
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