A
male
age
30-35,
*geek
writes:Hello Dear Cupid, here I am again.I will use incorrect phrases here (when I say GF i mean exGF, I am just getting the point across better)My girlfriend and I had been dating in a lang-distance-relationship for 1 year 5 months, we had spend the previous 4 years knowing each other, as good friends, well more than friends, since we would go on the occasional date. She has verbally and mentally abusive parents, and I spent the majority of that time supporting her and helping her through her tough times. She being the amazing girl she is, did the same for me.Now, as a couple. We were extremely close, because of the LDR we talked, a lot. We got to know the ins and outs of each other in a way I didn't think was possible, as a couple we kept communication and the biggest front of our relationship. If there was literally ANYTHING wrong, even if it would offend the other. We would say so, since pent up feelings and animosities only damage you and your other.Now covering that, as a couple, we seemed to have everything right, we just straight out loved each other. We got to see each other on occasion, and cherished every moment. I then drove over and moved her into college on the other side of the state (less than an hour from me, instead of being 7 hours from each other)We have a great weekend together, we went hiking and took pictures of each other in-front of a waterfall up in the woods and just enjoyed each others company to the fullest. We had some of the most intimate sex I have ever had. It was perfect.I drove her to college and got her all moved in, we planned on seeing each other in 2 weeks and going to her aunts wedding together. We where talking and planning what we wanted. (she really really wanted me to take her to a sex shop) then 2 hours later. She called me.......And said that she really did not want to say this.... and then hoped that we could still,be friends (cliche xD)and then dumped me. with the reason that she just cant do a long distance relationship. I didn't believer her, asking if this was a test? But it was real.....I love this girl. She has professed that she loves me, and that she will, and that I have been the best thing that has ever happened to her, the best friend and the best bf. She gave me a promise ring, I was going to send it back to her. But she asked me to please keep it, because it was for me, to show her appreciation and love...How can I cope with this? I am a wreck... I have went out with friends to have fun, went to parties, went hiking, biking, drinking....etc Went out to clubs with my friend offering to be my wingman, had a great time. But I just cannot seem to shake this feeling of total, utter loss and despair..... it has been a long time since I have found myself crying as hard as I have a couple random times now....I need some help.... thank you.--Zgeek
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (5 October 2011):
 It is completely normal to feel the way that you are feeling, you are heartbroken and you just never saw this coming as you thought you relationship was steady and on good terms. It is hard to accept I understand that and off course you are going to be upset and hurt and feel completely lost. This is all normal. But am afraid in the end you need to come to terms with it and realise that she doesn't want to be in the relationship any more. You need to accept it now and try your hardest to move on. Accept that while it was good it is now over and you need to come to terms with this and start living your life as a single man again. You are only young and you will find love again. Try and cut contact with her as it will only hurt you to keep in contact for the moment. You need some distance from her, so no calls, emails or texts. You need to start rebuilding yourself again. Good Luck.
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