A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have started seeing this girl who I know for 2 years now. I was never attracted to her but she made a pass at me a few months ago and now we have started dating. I still dont have very strong feelings for her but she is a really really nice girl. Will my feelings grow or will this just end in tears if I keep up the pretense? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (29 May 2014):
 If you don't feel it, you need to be honest... yes it might change later on but at this point you are essentially lying about how you feel.
I once asked "does love beget love?" in other words does someone loving you make you love them... I think it can open the doors to the idea of loving someone but you can't force it.
for both your sake and hers be honest with her...
A
male
reader, Mark1978  +, writes (27 May 2014):
 Let her go. Pretence is no way to have relationship, its not fair on you to keep up the pretence and not fair on here to be led along thinking you feel differently towards her than you actually do.
Realistically if you have known her for two years, and been together a few months, then by now you would have started to feel something. She may be a lovely person and a great girl, but she is not the one for you.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (27 May 2014):
 No one should have to pretend they REALLY like someone beyond the bounds of friendship.
So the sooner you let her know the better and yea, there will be tears. And she might not want to be around you for a long long while. Accept and respect that. And hopefully she will accept and respect that you "only" really see her as a friend.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2014): You can't help not feeling something for someone. But don't string her along, I would end it ASAP. It's not fair on her or you.
You said she is a really nice girl so I guess you do like her but more in a friend way. If this is the case then start there. Tell her you see her more a friend.
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