A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Im 21 and met this girl things were going fab. We had sex and i thought i fell in love. Then she tells me she is pregnant and im the father and also she is 15!!!!! She told me that she was 18 i still had a problem when she said 18 but i dealt with it. What am i going to do? She is 3 months gone and im so scared!! Could i go to prison i had no idea how old she was. And now she is carrying my child i cant look at her let alone touch her. Im so angry tht this could happen!!! any advice plz plz
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (29 April 2008):
 In England and Wales the same laws apply to heterosexual and
homosexual activity and offences can be committed by anyone,
male or female, over the age of 10, which is the age of criminal responsibility.
It is an offence to intentionally engage in sexual touching
with a young person aged 13, 14 or 15. ‘Touching’ covers
all physical contact, including touching with any part of
the body, with anything else and through anything, for
example, through clothing. It includes penetration.
A person aged 18 or over is liable to up to 14 years
imprisonment for this offence. A person under the age of
18 is liable to up to 5 years imprisonment. A person may
claim in their defence that they believed the young person to be over 16.
Intentional sexual touching of a young person under 13 is an
absolute offence. This means there can be no defence in
such a case that it was believed the person was over 16.
Sexual touching which involves penetration of the vagina,
anus or mouth by the penis or penetration of the vagina or
anus with a part of the body or any object is punishable by
up to life imprisonment. Sexual touching not involving
penetration is punishable by up to 14 years imprisonment.
From
http://www.brook.org.uk/content/M5_1_consent.asp
You need to settle this case with her.
Talk to her and see what she wants.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2008):
As the other answers demonstrate, this is how the real world works. Liability for sex only falls to one gender.
It doesn't matter that she didn't insist on using a condom either. It doesn't matter that she lied about her age. And it probably wouldn't have even mattered if she had lied about being on the pill.
You still get all the blame because you're the older male and she's the younger female.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 April 2008): You weren't worried about her age enough to keep it in your pants were you?
You brought this on yourself when you decided not to use contraception, and now there's an innocent baby caught up in it's parents immaturity. Maybe next time you'll bother to put a condom on before you jump into bed with the next random. Hopefully you've learnt a lesson from this. You reap what you sew my friend.
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A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (28 April 2008):
 Well you was stupid enough to sleep with her without using something called...... Whats that name???? Oh yes contraception. If you had your doubts about her why didn't you keep it in your pants?
There is an old saying........ Fools rush in where angels fear to tread.
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A
female
reader, crownedprincess +, writes (28 April 2008):
Hiya!
im sorry to hear about you situation but you really do need
to be careful! you shouldn't put your 110% trust into
everyone as it back fires like this has!
You wont go to prison as it sounds as if she gave you her
consent but you really do need to be very careful!
I know she maybe a really nice girl but i'd demand a DNA
test once the child is born because if she can lie about
her age she could be lyin about the child being yours!
love is a very tricky thing i can tell you that now and if
your scared about possibly becoming a father then you
really should be using protection!
i can understand where your coming from a member of my
hubby's family did the same as what she's done to you and
its very hard!! so send my a message if you need to talk
anymore!
good luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 April 2008): Yes you very well can go to jail for this. She is a child. You should just hope that nobody calls the authorities on you. Did you honestly not know her age?
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (28 April 2008):
 Once the baby is born you'll need to have a paternity test done to verify whether it's your baby, it can be done in vitro but that's pretty pricey. Get that done before you get legally involved with child support. Is there a chance you are not the father? Before anyone can press charges over this they will demand a paternity test anyway. You were stupid not to have used birth control but I guess you've figured that out by now. You don't have to "do" anything at this point, she is just as much to blame as you are, she lied about her age and spread her legs. If it is yours, all you can hope for is that the authrities will believe that she lied about her age. It's your word against hers.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 April 2008): Ok, first of all, this isnt ALL her fault... were you wearing a condom? If not its jsut as much your fault as hers.
Secondly you need to have a proper adult conversation with her, about why she lied to you about her age, and about what she is going to do with the baby.
Have you seen a pregnancy test? Do you have proof that she is actually pregnant? Because at 15 a girl's menstrual cycle is often very irregular.
About prison... I really dont know if you genuinely didnt know her age and could prove it, as in she has fake ID ar something like that, but you do need to be more careful.
Perhaps if you were really falling in love with her, things arent as bad as they seem right now.
Calm down, sleep on it, and talk to her, ok?
:-DHope this helps!!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 April 2008): Ok, first of all, this isnt ALL her fault... were you wearing a condom? If not its jsut as much your fault as hers.
Secondly you need to have a proper adult conversation with her, about why she lied to you about her age, and about what she is going to do with the baby.
Have you seen a pregnancy test? Do you have proof that she is actually pregnant? Because at 15 a girl's menstrual cycle is often very irregular.
About prison... I really dont know if you genuinely didnt know her age and could prove it, as in she has fake ID ar something like that, but you do need to be more careful.
Perhaps if you were really falling in love with her, things arent as bad as they seem right now.
Calm down, sleep on it, and talk to her, ok?
:-DHope this helps!!
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