A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:long distance, recently re-flamed relationship(lived together long term before). went for a five day visit. i love her very much, and she tells me she loves me...obviously the distance is difficult to deal with. on this past visit, we made love with each other on the first two days, but after that when i tried to initiate, she just "didn't feel like it", so for the last 3 days of the visit we did not. she assured me that it wasn't me, but that sometimes she just doesn't "feel sexy". as i said, i love her very much and am willing to give her that space when she wants it, but i also want to share with her during the time that i get to be near her, which is infrequent. it was frustrating and confusing. i don't want to doubt that she still loves me but naturally, i am. any guys through anything similar? any girls get the same feeling of being "not sexy" for a period of time?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2007): i know that it was not period-related, because she told me when she had it and while i was there was pretty much smack dab between them.
and frankly, when i do start to try to make her feel sexy, it seems to make her angry.
and i have asked her why she feels that way and she says she can't explain it...it's just something that happens to her. she also seems to be put off by my asking.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2007): Are you serious? were woman of course we go through 'non sexy' periods lolIm not sure about other woman so i can only speak for myself but my 'non sexy' periods usually coinside with either my period starting or just finishing! Also if i feel as though ive put a little weight on i usually get a little self conscience aswel. If your not seeing each other frequently and shes not getting any pleasure from a man for long periods of time this can sometimes make you feel a little undesirable - I was single for over a year!!!!!Do you lie in bed and hold her telling her how sexy you find her? Do you except no as a final answer or do you start pleasuring her (stroking, gentle kissing all over her body) to try and get her in the mood? Sometimes a little bit or reasurance will go along way.If nothing chances though just talk to her ask her why she feels the way she does!Take Care
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