A
male
age
36-40,
*alisuse
writes:Hello. This is my first time posting. I'm not sure wheather I can continue to trust my girl friend. We have been going out 5 and a half months now and she has cheated on me. She got drunk one night while one of her male friends were over and they ended up sleeping together. A few days later she told me. She was very upset and was crying... the whole 9 yards. I really do believe she was upset and felt bad about it. She promised it would never happen again and that she would stop seeing this individual. I think the only 2 reasons why I decided not to leave was because of her nearly 2 year old daughter who's father is not around and the fact that I really love my girlfriend. I'm just not sure I have made the right decision. She sais she loves me and that I am the best boyfriend she has ever had, probably because the old ones were drug users and abused her. It just hurts and although over a month has passed I still get angry about it from time to time, not angry with her I just keep it inside. I have told her how I feel about it and that she has to earn that trust back and she agrees. Latley though we seem to argue over petty little things and she seems to be getting annoyed with me over nothing. Again I have discussed this with her and she assures me that it is the stress of other things going on in her life right now, that I will not mention, and that she loves me. So long story short... should I stay? or should I go? Any advice or help would be greatly appreciated so I can stop banging my head off the wall. Thanks
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2010): yep, get rid of her. 5 months and she cannot keep her legs closed. speaks volumes of her.
A
male
reader, jalisuse +, writes (26 July 2010):
jalisuse is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you very much to all who replied. You have all been really helpful. I think I'm going to take dyeruz's advice and take some time apart from her and try and think things threw. I'm really glad I stumbled across this website :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2010): I wouldn't stick around. You'll always be wondering if she'll hurt you that way in the future, and she most likely will. At best, she'll get to the stage where she feels she has to find ways to be as nice as possible to make you happy, but then she won't be acting on true feelings when she does that either. I would go while you're still single, and find someone who hasn't insulted you even close to that much, and hopefully never will.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2010): If you want a life of uncertainy stay with her. If she truely cared about you she would have never willingly slept with another man, even if she was drunk. Run away from this woman. You can't trust her now or ever.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2010): If a woman cheats on you for what ever reason (alcohol may be a factor but it is not an excuse) then she is not good girlfriend material and she certainly isn't good wife material.
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A
male
reader, dyeruz  +, writes (25 July 2010):
You've been going out for five months and she's cheated on you already. You're the best boyfriend she's ever had yet that counted for nothing when she let someone else, not you, sleep with her. She broke the trust and is probably really remorseful but she still didn't stop herself, drunk or not. No excuses, she knew what she was doing. First off you're not obligated to her or her daughter, I'm sure you're a very nice guy who always does the right thing, but you must also remember to do the right thing by yourself. If she can cheat after five months, then she's not as committed as you are, plain and simple, if she loved you as much as she claims she does she wouldn't have slept with her friend. Don't rush into any hasty decisions, if need be take some time apart to think things through clearly. Sometimes you have to let someone go, if they come back and show that commitment to the relationship she claims she has, then you can both work on it together to repair it, but I think now every time she goes out, the old hurt and doubt will always be there, and that's not healthy for anyone. Good luck!
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