A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:think only woman can help me here the problem is we have been together 4 years both have our own houses the problem is it was my birthday 2 weeks ago she says she wasnt well enough to go out and get me a present we are both in our forties sorry forgot that so the next day she is still not well so i am home alone again anyway she calls that night says we will both go out next day for a present and a meal she calls next night says sorry still not feeling 100 per cent i go off in a bad mood dont see or talk for 3 days then she says to me i have had enough its over i havnt spoke to her since left a couple of texts no reply what is she thinking
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2012): Only women can help you here? Why's that? We're not mind readers...
You've spent quite a bit of energy describing her behavior, but do you think you might have contributed to her lack of commitment in anyway? What else went down before the bottom fell out? Were there issues that she brought up previously? Surely you sensed something? If you've truly been dating for 4 years, I just cannot believe she simply left you out of the blue without some sort of warning or preempting issue. I just get the sense you're simplifying the story here.
You're getting a lot of "she-hate" on this thread...here's my guess why: When men act clueless about why they've been dumped, chances are they know very well what they've done to upset their partner, but they just don't want to admit it to themselves or the woman. We've all dated that guy at some point in our lives.
But, you don't seem all that upset about it apart from her bruising your ego...so I'm not sure it's entirely a bad thing that she left you. Maybe you can do better, maybe she can too.
No one can really tell you why she left you if you're not honest with us or yourself. My general advice going on what little I know is just to work on your communication and listening skills with your next partner.
A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (27 January 2012):
 wah wah wah, somebody call the wahhhbulance.
It was your birthday, she was too ill to go out and buy the widdle boy a present.
The next day she is still not well, and the next day too ....
so instead of saying I am sorry you are not feeling well is there something I can do to help, you go off your nut ...
You tell me what she is thinking!
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A
female
reader, natasia +, writes (27 January 2012):
 ps And of course I guess you realise that if she wasn't well, you shouldn't have pushed her about the present, made her feel bad and kind of emotionally blackmailed her. And then been officially offended and gone silent on her, in a mood.
I'm sorry again to say, but I guess this kind of behaviour is what she has finally had enough of.
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A
female
reader, natasia +, writes (27 January 2012):
She's thinking, I'm afraid, that the time has come to end this with you. She has probably been wanting to for some time - months, if not years (yes, believe me - that is possible). And now finally she has got to the point of not caring, so she is able to end it.
I am really sorry to break it to you like that, but that is my honest opinion. I may be wrong, but I fear I might be right. : (
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