A
male
 ,
anonymous
writes:I broke up with my long term girlfriend after 7 years when I cheated on her and confessed. I then moved away for 6 months and came back. She still calls me to hang out and do things together. She says things jokingly like "Don't try to seduce me." Or one day she asked me to come over and hook up her new DVD player and she had just gotten out of the shower. She tells me "You know I'm naked right?" I just respond like "You sure are." and keep doing what I'm doing. She still kisses me (not on the mouth) and she says she doesn't want me to feel an ounce of pain. I asked her how she wanted to go about this whole thing and she responds that she just wants to be single and enjoy her life but at the same time is kissing me, showing up at the door naked and telling me no one can take my place and such things giving me mixed messages as I am still very much in love with her and want to be back together? Should I just leave her alone as seeing her is bitter sweet? I don't know what is I'm supposed to do but I know I love her too much to just be friends but I don't want to make her think I don't care. Help!!!!!!
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female
reader, sibaan +, writes (10 June 2006):
 sticky situation from a guys point of view but from a girls point of view its a brilliant plan!she is trying to play hard to get, im moving on and happy go lucky but in actual fact she just wants to see if you will start dating other girls or fall for her again...watch out this girl could be planning to get you back and you wont even know it...
A
female
reader, Wendyg  +, writes (10 June 2006):
 She still has feelings for you and is basically given you the run around now, as you cheated on her, she doesnt want to hurt you, but at the same times wants you to know that she can get other guys and is trying to show you that you shouldnt have done what you did and at any given moment she can have her pick of the guys. She actually probably still wants you but is playing a bit of a game along the way, and trying to make you pay in between. By flirting like she is and then taking it away so to speak and mentioning other guys shes trying to make you jealous and show you you were a jerk to cheat. How far you let this go and carry on is up to you, but until its out of her system i dont think there will be a chance of a fresh start, shes enjoying being in control, and is trying to get you where she wants to. It could ultimately get to the point where you really really beg her to get back together, and she just bluntly walks away. She may have no intention of getting back with you but wants you to see what your missing out on. You either keep running to her and put up with it, or tell her you cant carry on and its all or nothing, or you just simply tell her to quit the games. at the moment you are in limbo and there is no guarantee that she wants you back, so i think you may have to force the issue, its not going to do either of you any good at the current state of play. You either make a fresh, or you dont, the playing games will take its toll on both of you in the end and make this a torrid experience. If she doesnt want to make a fresh accept did wrong and walk away.
Take care
x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 June 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question Well Phoebe. I asked her to give it another go and she said no but she wasn't ruling it out either. Thats were my confussion is. I don't know how to respond to her behavior when she does those things and says another and also guys call her and she says that they are just friends and I have nothing to worry about.
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A
female
reader, Phoebe Halliwell +, writes (9 June 2006):
 Dear Reader,
if you love her that much then why not give it another go, she clearly likes you if she shows up naked and tells you about it! Don't blurt it out, just act yourself and tell her you want to give it another go. She said no-one can replace you, and she wants to enjoy her life, so why not mix the two together, let her enjoy her life, with you.
Go For it! You like her, she likes you, what's the worst that can happen, really.
All The Best - tell me how it goes!
Phoebe
xxx
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A
female
reader, ASK SAMI +, writes (9 June 2006):
 In some relationships, once either male or female cheats on the other, then the relationship has ended. But in your case, this is not true. The girl in question seems to still have feelings for you even though you did cheat on her. Though, saying this, she may be doing it to mess with your head a little or is doing it to let you know that she has not been beaten. Even so, you should very well talk to her and try to get out of her why she is teasing you like this. Maybe she still has feelings, maybe she doesn't. The only way you are going to find out is to confront her and explain to her how you feel about her teasing, and more importantly, how you feel about HER.
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