A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I'm new to the dating world after being married for a long time and am just trying to navigate my way…would appreciate thoughts and opinions :) I met a new man out for a blind date last night. We kept it short. Just a drink and sort of a get-to-know-you talk. Well, he seemed nice enough. BUT, he kept looking at the door. He literally looked at the door of this pub/restaurant probably over 75 times in the course of 1 1/2 hours. He had to turn his head 90 degrees to look at the door, so it was very obvious and very uncomfortable for me. I felt like he wasn't paying attention to me or listening to me. Finally I asked him if he was nervous of if he was expecting someone. He apologized and said that he knows "lots of people" that frequent this place (he chose the meeting spot). Although, this curtailed his looking by about 20%, he did not stop. It was obvious that he really had to TRY not to keep checking out the door.I don't want to go out with him again for this reason. If he asks, should I tell him? Or should I just say that I don't think we're a match? Do you give someone like this another chance? Or is this who he is…rude? I don't' know… I have very little dating experience even though I'm 47. Any advice would be appreciated! Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, WhenCowsAttack +, writes (24 January 2016):
I think he took you there on purpose hoping to make an ex jealous.
Don't go out with this dude again. He's got baggage.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (23 January 2016):
 If you don't want to go out with him again,. then just say that? I'd stick to the "I don't really see us as a good fit" and leave it at that.
My guess is he either DIDN'T want to be there or be seen... or get caught out dating - whether by friends or a GF. Or he had another woman lined up after you?
NOT that it really matters as you have already decided he isn't for you. (and I can't blame you for that).
I think that behavior is REALLY rude.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2016): Nah. Move on.Believe me, you won't be missing anything.Why choose a spot he frequents often and might run into people he knows - including a wife or girlfriend - if he is married or attached?That would be stupid.But I would take his behaviour as a red flag.It seems he was just interested in a booty call if he could land one. Or he wasn't interested in you at all and was keeping his eye out for somebody he might like better.But there was definitely something fishy about his behaviour. The dating world will be full of losers. You just learned that first hand. He definitely did not try that hard to make a good first impression.I suspect this guy might be a player. Playing the field. Forget him and find somebody better. Might take stepping on a few frogs but your prince is out there somewhere. I caution you to be careful with people. So many men with game out there looking to take advantage of women. Never jumpinto bed with a man too soon if you are looking for a serious, comitted relationship.Try and enjoy and keep an open mind but also watch for red flags and trust your gut instinct. Good luck.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2016): Seems odd that he chose where to meet with you and yet he spent all the time acting nervous or strangely like that. I wonder if he wanted to catch someone for some reason, and felt if he took you there, he would be "killing two birds with one stone". On the basis of him not being good company for the reason that his attention was barely even on you, not sure I would bother to be honest. If you want to try again though, you could suggest lunch or a cafe and see how he behaves in a different spot.....
...............................
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (23 January 2016):
 I'm guessing that he was concerned that his wife or girlfriend would enter the place where you were....
Don't bother seeing this guy again...
Good luck....
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2016): That does sound odd, as if he was expecting .. or fearing .. ? that he see someone he knows come in? Why keep turning around like that on a first date? Did he actually speak to anyone he knew while you were with him? I would be asking myself is this man hoping NOT to see someone while I am out with him. Not sure what I would do, but if he did actually do it as many times as you say he did, I don't think I would see him again as I would find it really off-putting. I wonder is he really single.....
...............................
|
