A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:my "boy-friend" and i had sex for the first time yesterday. mind you, i told him i didn't want to have sex because i really liked him and wanted to really get to know him, but we did and thats fine, sex matters but its only a big deal when people make it a big a big deal. anywhozziez it was bad! when he was attempting oral either he was using either teeth or he was just sucking way to hard! and i didn't get wet at all... and i told him "no, that's too hard." "it hurts." he would stop, use tongue, but then go right back to the painful attempt i did body language, jolting up, should be a sign. am i right? also, how would i communicate this with him? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Dear Mandy  +, writes (15 April 2013):
 HI
Firstly if you were not ready you should not have just did it to make HIM happy, yes sex is important in a relationship but only when you are BOTH ready. And as for him being that terrible I would have just stopped and said unless your going to listen to me when I say it hurts it will never happen again. Nerves can play a big part in having sex for the first time with eachother, however he sounds like he has a lot to learn. You should sit down and say to him that next time if IF there is a next time he has to listen to you when you tell him. You just jolting or moving away is not enough to make things change, you need to keep verbal and let him know at all times, or the fun will be completely zapped out of it and will probally be the ending of your relationship.
Mandy x
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