A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I've been seeing this guy for about a month. I really like him and we had sex. It was my first time and it was really good but then it started to hurt and we had to stop. Is this normal? Thank you. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, ukmatt +, writes (21 April 2007):
 Indeed, we supposed that the writer was on about anal sex. Perhaps we shouldn't have, but it was a male writing about the sex he had with his male partner.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2007): ok can i jst ask why si everyone saying it was anal sex when it doesn't say that in the question,how do you know it was anal? fair enough if it was but i'm just wondering and yes it is normal for it to hurt your body has to get used to it and once you've done it afew times it'll fel great.
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A
female
reader, XXpussycatXX +, writes (20 April 2007):
hya hun
why dont you try lube it will be easier and more comfort maybe just try something smaller for you to get used to haveing anal sex
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A
male
reader, ukmatt +, writes (20 April 2007):
Worry not, it's totally natural. Let's not forget, it was your first time to experience anal sex. The anatomical make up of the rectum, and the purpose of the sphincter muscle is to empty the rectum, and it will take a little time for your body to get use to something entering rather than leaving. The replier "realm" has offered some excellent advice here! Lots of Lube is a must for the first couple of times you do it and get used to this sensation. You could also try lying on your left hand side because the anatomical make up of a person, predefines that the rectum is easier to access from this angle. You may also find it useful that because you're not used to this type of sex; a handy little hint. As he puts his penis in, he should pause before full penetration. By waiting for a few seconds, it's getting the sphincter used to something 'coming in' and will relax a little rather than going for full-on penetration without this short but vital pause. Take it slow though, and eventually, the pain will subside, and you'll actually find it really enjoyable. Don't forget though, for something so intimate, you need to stay in control until you feel comfortable with these sensations.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2007): It really depends on what you were doing. "Sex" doesn't have an agreed-upon definition.
But as a rule of thumb if something starts to hurt, ask your partner to stop, readjust, try again. Eventually you'll both find what works for you. Keep copious amounts of lubricant on hand.
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