A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am scared of getting an hiv test. Me and my boyfriend broke up for eight months and then I got a new boyfriend and slept with with out protection. I broke up with him because he was annoying. We only dated for two months. He has never been checked out. It's completely out of my nature to sleep with someone so soon. I hadn't thought I would have it until recently. I have been feeling nauseous and my glands under my jaw have been swollen and me and my previous boyfriend have been back together for a while. Now I am hoping I didn't give it to him, if I have it. I love him so much. I am also afraid that if I get tested and test positive we are going to break up.
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female
reader, person12345 +, writes (24 January 2010):
 I don't know why you jumped immediately to HIV! I encourage you to get the regular pap tests and to get an HIV test if you want, but HIV doesn't present with those symptoms. HIV symptoms are near impossible to feel. I REALLY doubt you have it. Plus if you do have it and gave it to him, a test won't change that, you'll both still have it. Plus if you break up, you can BOTH spread it unknowingly. Go take the test to put your mind at ease. And if you do have it, it would be best for both of you to know now as there are plenty of drugs to manage it and the drugs will be more effective earlier on.
A
female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (24 January 2010):
 Yes, you MUST get tested to be responsible both to yourself and your current boyfriend. If he dumps you, then so be it. Your first priority absolutely has to be to find out so that IF you are infected you can begin treatment.......
No need for me to repeat Rainorfire's comments about having unprotected sex, and not telling the man you're involved with. He's right on target.
Hope you are in the clear........learn from this experience!
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A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE +, writes (24 January 2010):
 If you gave him Hiv he might as well forgive you and stick with you any way its his fault he was a dumbass for not using protection or asking you to get tested, I dont see how people can have sex with each other wich is pretty disgusting the transfer bodily fluids and the like there willing to do that for a few moments of pleasure but they wont talk about the important stuff.
Any way you need to find out if you have Hiv if you dont get treated it could progress to aids and you will die. plus its just plain F'up not to tell some one your having sex with you have Hiv and its illegal, who cares if he breaks up with you its your responsibility to tell, Medicines have come along way Hiv is not a death sentence but you need to find out if you have it or not and tell the truth.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2010): Failing to be tested for such a disease will have fatal consequences. I advise you to be tested so you can be treated properly if that is indeed the case. Further, even if it is not HIV, it could be something else that needs to be treated. What you are dealing with here is a very serious matter. Lastly, if you believe you have HIV and can prevent giving it to someone else, such as your boyfriend, you have a legal responsibility to do so. Failing to prevent the spread of disease with such wanton disregard can have legal consequences as well, not to mention the fact you may ruin someone's life.
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A
male
reader, Honest Answer +, writes (23 January 2010):
 If you test positive, the last thing you are going to worry about is him breaking up. If you think there is the slightest chance that you have HIV you need to do see a doctor. No if's, no and's or but's about it.
Jef
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2010): If you get tested positive, him breaking up with you will not be the major concern. If you are worried you could have HIV, start using protection immediately! The test itself is not something to be worried about, it's whether you have it or not. It is very dangerous to not get tested as you can spread it to others you love, also not get treatment for yourself!
I was with a man who had never got tested in his life and he had never used protection either! I thought he was a responsible man and I trusted him to not have anything, but when I found out he had never been tested I went and tested myself immediately. As well as not having unprotected sex with him again. Luckily for him and me, I was clean. Maybe you are too, but you must take responsibility for yourself and the ones you share the bed with! This isn't about being scared or not, or about your boyfriend leaving you. This is about taking responsibility and being mature. You need to take care of yourself and you haven't, the very first thing to do is get tested. Deal with the consequences of the results when you have them in your hand, and it could be a good idea to have your boyfriend get tested too.
What is scary is, that if you dont get tested, and the two of you break up, he goes and spreads it to even more people. And then you are too scared to tell your next boyfriend again, and so you pass it on. Do you have no respect for the life and health of others? You owe it to your boyfriend to tell him the truth, that you are going to get tested because you are afraid you might have HIV, and that he should get tested too.
Even if you dont have HIV there are more common STD's out there that are easily treated, the sooner you find out you have them the better. If you wait for too long, in worst case you can become sterile, or develop AIDS.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2010): GET TESTED!!
You don't have to tell him that you are having a test, because if it comes back all clear then you can put it in the past and learn from that mistake. But if you love this guy then you surely want to make sure you haven't given him a disease, it is really rare for people to get HIV but it happens all over the world. You owe him the truth and you also owe yourself the truth.
You can treat HIV and keep it under control, the sooner it is done the better.
I truly hope you are fine, perhaps you have a simple cold or bug but because you know you didn't use protection you are worryin-which in turn makes things feel worse.
Please get yourself tested, I hope it comes back fine and you can just get on with your life. x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2010): You need to get tested imagine the consequences if you don't! Also there are many other things that could cause this swelling etc. so you could have been worrying over nothing! I understand you are scared about losing your boyfriend but if you love him then he deserves the truth and will also need to get tested.
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