A
male
age
36-40,
*uaris
writes:Alright so about a month ago I ended a relationship that I was very unhappy in. The girl didnt appreciate me, she lied a lot, and kinda just used me. While we were together lots of my friends said I should break up with her. Even some of her friends said that. So then I felt strong enough to do it. But now that weve been broken up I dont feel very confident about myself. It used to be she had no friends and I was popular but now its kind of reveresed. I stay at home and she has made new friends. Even though she was bad to me it bothers me that shes seems to be benefiting from the break and Im not. I feel like Im ging crazy. I was a good guy to her and she was bad to me. When we were going out it seemed like I was getting more female attention to. Whereas my ex was not liked by many guys. But now that were separated I dont get the same attention and it looks like guys are liking her more now. It just bothers me. I get out of a bad relationship so I can be happy. And the person who was doing most of the wronging is having the time of their life. I feel like Im going crazy now.
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male
reader, GrimmReality +, writes (3 August 2009):
 Make her insignificant...destroy everything..block her email addresses, phone numbers of her and her family and friends, block her and delete her at social sites. Make her not even a memory. easier said than done, but it really is the only thing that works if you want to move forward with your life as soon as possible.Delete her from every aspect of your life and move on. Make it like she never existed. In reality, the opposite of love is indifference, because hate is an indication that you still care.
A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (3 August 2009):
Don't let it bother you. Do you know how much satisfaction it would give her to know that you're feeling miserable while she's having the time of her life? Breakups are difficult on both ends, I'm sure she's hurt and she's coping by putting herself out there and meeting new people--and that's what you should be doing also.
Maybe you're not getting the attention you were getting before because it's showing. When we're mopy and unhappy, others can see it and it's a turn off. Even if you are unhappy, do what you can to put yourself out there, be with your friends and meet new girls. Things always take time, but it helps when you're trying to make the best of things. You'll be happy again, trust me.
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A
female
reader, Jayney Y  +, writes (3 August 2009):
 Thing's will get better. If a lot of people advised you to get rid of her, then I'd be taking that on board, because it sounds like you weren't too happy when you were with her. Sometimes, when we have to end a relationship that we didn't really want to finish, we tend to dwell on it and it brings us down and makes us no fun to be around. As soon as you start to cheer up and move on, I think you'll find you'll start having a good time again. Good luck :)
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