A
female
age
36-40,
*osie1
writes:Ive got myself in a bit of a situation. I live with my boyfriend of 5 years and our relationships has been a bit rocky a for long time. when we spend time together all we seem to do is argue and the arguments are always about the same things. i often feel happy when im spending time on my own or with other people. I was willing to brush yet another argument under the carpet until i started getting close to a guy at work. we have flirted with each other for as long as i can remember and our colleagues are forever joking that we really suit each other. The thing that they dont know is we have recently starting flirting a whole lot more and now i have cheated on my boyfriend with him. the thing is i really enjoyed it and want it to happen again and only a bit of me feels guilty. i know i need to leave my boyfriend as its not fair on him and i wouldnt like it done to me, the thing is i feel trapped. i dont have anywhere else to live and dont think i can afford to live on my own and i just dont know what i will do. i have no family around where i live as i moved away to be with my boyfriend. im trying my hardest not to get too emotionally involved with this other guy as he too has a partner and also a child. i think he feels the same about her as i do about my boyfriend but i cant imagine he would leave her due to his responsibilities as a dad. does anyone have any advice as to what i should do next, and maybe some advice about living arrangements.
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female
reader, cutiepie25  +, writes (9 December 2010):
 Honey, I feel for you. I'm going through a bit of the same thing. I guess I am wanting to ask you if you're the one who really wants to leave or if your boyfriend has asked you to move out? I mean either way he cannot kick you out unless he goes through the proper eviction process. If I was you, I would talk to the other man about it and see if maybe he can help you out. If not, I suggest you try to save some money and stay put and don't tell your man you have any extra money cuz god knows he will probably just accuse you of doing something dirty or illegal to get it lol. My ex and I still live together but eventhough he has asked me why I don't just move out cuz we can't stand each other, I just tell him to buzz off cuz he will never and I mean never have the balls to kick me and my kids out. Guys are funny that way sometimes. Y'all don't wanna be together because there is constant arguing everyday, but I say if it was hat bad he woulda put a restraining order or something on you. Don't worry, if you need any other advice and need to ask someone, just ask me. I'm only 25 but I been through a lot of shit.
A
male
reader, Buddha  +, writes (8 December 2010):
 Hi Josiel!
Ok ill give you myt two cents on this one.
First off I know what it is like living with a partner-I did it at 19! you say you dont live near family but is it possible for you to go stay with them or friends even for a few days to sort your head out? You realise your mistake which is good but it is not fair on your b.f at all. You need time to think this through...you cannot be with your work mate so scrap that thought right away please! You will not feel good about yourself knowing you have ruined another persons relationship WHERE A CHILD IS INVOLVED.
Ask yourself very very honestly-do you love your partner? Are you willing to identify the cause of your fights and be honest with each other?? Sit down with him and tell him how your feeling and then tell him exactly what it is you want. Remember there are two people in a relationship-so ask him what he wants aswell!
Take your time and dont make any rash decisions you may later regret. Hope it helped a little :) Peace!
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