A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hi,at the minute i am in a a bad place, i met a guy wile shopping and we met had a chat and drink, and striaght away we realised we clicked, so he gave me his number, and he lives 60 miles away from me, then when i got home everything seem to go wrong in my life although i kept in contact with this guy and after a few phone calls we realised we want to go out, althought its been 9 months now since we met and we havent had a chance to meet up what with everything thats been going on in my life, and i have been very sick, i understnad he misses me and his frustration although i feel the same i try to hide my emotions, so yesterday, new years eve, i had an operation, it wasnt serious is was just a day procedure, when i got home at 6pm i rang him and he was so depressed so i tried my best to cheer him up and talk about the future (because we have so much planned) even though i was just after an operation. but there was no cheering him up, then i asked him can i talk 2 ou at 12, he said "i am not bloody well staying on the phone all night", i said i never asked you to, so that went into a big argument and at the end i said you know what dont ring me at 12, and said i wont and hung up on me, so when 12 came a txed him to wissh him a happy new year and to say that i loved him and i was sorry, and he never replied, which hurts me, some people may think it wasnt a big deal but i think he should of at least send a text message. so this morning when i woke up i texted him telling him we were over because i am clearly no enough for him, and now i dont know if ive done the right thing??i want him to understand that i feel the same and that i am going to see him asap, its just been everything in my life was just messed up for the last 8 months!!please help me!!
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male
reader, Arianz +, writes (1 January 2009):
Dear
I think if you share you every problem with him then it will work on him. He is far from you so its hard for him to understand what you basically doing.
so try to make him understand that you love him lot by sweet sms or voice sms.
Then call him and share you feeling about him and tell him what happed last days.
When you will feel better then visit him everything happened with you. I hope he will understand.
Now your 1st job is try to make him easy with you. So call him, text him and show your feeling for him.
NOTE: In long distance relation patient and trust is a big matter. So never behave unexplained or unclear. Share everything and sometimes tell him to visit you (With cute voice)
I am not good in English to please forgive if my words hurt you.
BEST OF LUCK
Take care
arianz
A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2009): You probably jumped the gun by telling him its over...so now you have to do some damage control. It's difficult to cheer someone up when they are depressed. It usually makes them feel worse. It is better to let them know you understand and let it go at that. We can't control others feelings, sometimes we can't even control our own!
The only way this relationship is going to work is with lots of patience and trust. I know, I am in a Long Distance Relationship that has been going on for almost a year now. He lives 3,000 miles away. We have only spent a total of 3 weeks in each others company. But we have spent 100s and 100s of hours on the phone! We have gotten to know eachother better than we would have if we lived in the same area. I've never communicated as much in a relationship as he and I have. He is coming out here sometime this winter to visit again (or maybe, to stay forever...that may be wishful thinking on my part)
The way I would handle the situation you are in is to phone him or text him...apologize once again...explain that you are depressed too, and frustrated by the distance between you. Ask him to have patience with you and you will with him. And hope that he will be understanding.
Good Luck!
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